“You're on CNN. The show that leads into me is puppets making crank phone calls. What is wrong with you?” ShowsPhonesPuppetsPhone CallsCnnCrank Author:Jon Stewart
“Our show is obviously at a disadvantage with any of the other news shows we're competing against. For one thing, we are fake. They are not. So in terms of credibility, we are ... well, oddly enough we're about even.” WellsEnoughShowsTermOne ThingNewsFakeCompetingCredibilityDisadvantages Author:Jon Stewart
“The beautiful thing about faking a news show is the topicality is delayed.” ShowsBeautifulNewsBeautiful ThingsDelayed Author:Jon Stewart
“Some people have criticized the United States and the United States military for guarding oil fields and not guarding the Iraqi National Museum which had priceless antiquities in it. They say that this shows a fundamental lack of respect for Iraqi history. I want to remind those people of this: The oldest relics in the museum, 5,000 or 6,000 years old. That oil is 65 million years old. You had to guard that. ... Those antiquities will only last another 5,000 or 6,000 years. When we burn that oil, those fumes will linger long after.” PeopleWantYearsLongStatesShowsLastsUnitedMillionsUnited StatesMilitaryFieldsFundamentalsOilMuseumsPricelessAntiquityOld YouRelicsGuardingUnited States MilitaryLack Of RespectOil Field Author:Jon Stewart
“Sitting around with funny people, banging out jokes and creating a television show. I have no hobbies, no outside interests. I'm fine with spending 14 hours a day putting a show together with tape and string.” PeopleShowsTogetherInterestHoursTelevisionFineCreatingJokesSittingSpendingStringsTapeHobbiesTelevision ShowsSitting AroundBangingFunny People Author:Jon Stewart
“But the main thing I don't want to be is un-funny. That's really the mandate. Just whatever we're doing, make it as funny as we can possibly make it. And believe me, if the show starts going down, we'll introduce a baby. We'll do everything that they did on `Family Ties.' I'm not afraid of that.” IfsWantBelieveShowsBabyTiesNot AfraidIntroducingBelieve In MeMandatesFamily Ties Author:Jon Stewart
“Never name it after yourself. Maybe we'll throw a with in there. That seems to work. Like Late Show With David Letterman.” ShowsSeemsNamesLateLetterman Author:Jon Stewart
“At first the difference will be in whatever atmosphere I bring into it. It's not going to be like, 'I really want to do The Daily Show and I'd love to turn it into an abstract musical.' I like the format and the chance to satirize the news.” WantFirstsShowsTurnsDifferencesChanceNewsMusicalAtmosphereAbstractFormatDaily Show Author:Jon Stewart
“I always get that cautionary warning right before I get off the phone with an interviewer. It's: 'Good luck with the show. I really like it, and if this goes wrong, you'll be hearing from my attorneys.” IfsShowsLuckPhonesHearingWarningGood LuckAttorneyInterviewers Author:Jon Stewart
“I think people are used to people in show business having a lot of hubris. I think I have a normal amount of self-loathing but because I'm in show business it's considered self-deprecation. In normal life I would just be considered your average neurotic.” PeopleThinkingSelfShowsUsedAmountNormalAverageShow BusinessNeuroticLoathingNormal LifeSelf LoathingHubrisSelf Deprecation Author:Jon Stewart
“The country's 24 hour political pundit perpetual panic conflictinator did not cause our problems but its existence makes solving them that much harder. The press can hold its magnifying up to our problems bringing them into focus, illuminating issues heretofore unseen or they can use that magnifying glass to light ants on fire and then perhaps host a week of shows on the sudden, unexpected dangerous flaming ant epidemic. If we amplify everything we hear nothing.” IfsCountryUseShowsProblemLightPoliticalPoliticsCausesHoursExistenceIssuesFireFocusWeekDangerousHarderPressesGlassesUnexpectedHostPanicPerpetualUnseenAntsEpidemicsIlluminatingPunditsAmplifyMagnifyingMagnifying Glass Author:Jon Stewart
“People would like to place a standard on our show that doesn't exist. We're not set up for reporting; we don't have an apparatus for that. We're discussing things that hopefully people might get something out of, but it's wildly inconsistent. Just because we hit on points that resonate, or people think are real complaints - that doesn't make us journalists.” PeopleThinkingRealShowsMightStandardsHopefullyJournalistComplaintsDiscussingInconsistent Author:Jon Stewart
“Maybe we should always show pictures. Bin Laden, pictures of our wounded service people, pictures of maimed innocent civilians. We can only make decisions about war if we see what war actually is - and not as a video game where bodies quickly disappear leaving behind a shiny gold coin.” PeopleIfsShouldWarShowsBodyGamesDecisionBehindsGoldLeavingDisappearVideoInnocentWoundedCoinsCiviliansBin LadenGold Coins Author:Jon Stewart
“The real challenge is when I'm at work, I'm at work. I'm locked in, I'm ready to go, I'm focused. When I'm at home, I'm locked in and I'm ready to go and I'm focused on home. We don't watch the show. We don't watch the news. We don't do any of that stuff. I sit down, I play Barbies. And sometimes the kids will come home and play with me.” RealSometimesPlayShowsHomeKidsStuffChallengesWatchesReadyNewsFocusedComing HomeLockedBarbie Author:Jon Stewart
“You think that sense of humor goes as far as our ideology. I think that ultimately, we have we have very interesting reactions on our show. People are constantly saying, "I love your-your show is so funny, until you made a joke about global warming, which is a serious issue, and I can't believe you did that. And I am never watching your show again."” PeopleThinkingBelieveMadeI CanShowsInterestingIssuesLove YouSeriousJokesReactionsIdeologyGlobal WarmingSense Of HumorVery InterestingSay I Love YouSerious Issues Author:Jon Stewart
“If you want, you can try and get a broader perspective, or you can find people who are absolutely out of their minds, or find people that are doing incredibly complex and interesting and urgent journalism. And the same goes for our show. It's a prism into people's own ideologies, when they watch our program. This is just our take.” PeopleIfsWantTryingMindShowsInterestingWatchesPerspectiveProgramComplexesIdeologyJournalismUrgentPrisms Author:Jon Stewart
“[John McCain] didn't believe me. I think anybody who's been in a POW camp for five years can - take eight minutes on The Daily Show.” ThinkingYearsBelieveShowsFiveMinutesEightFive YearsCampsBelieve In MeMccainPowDaily Show Author:Jon Stewart
“The frustration of our [The Daily] show is- very much outside any parameters of the media or the government. We don't have access to these people, we don't have access. We don't go to dinners we don't have cocktail parties. We don't you know, you've seen what happens when one of us ends up at the White House Correspondents' Dinner, it doesn't end well.” PeopleKnowsWellsEndsShowsGovernmentHappensHouseWhitePartyMediaDinnerAccessFrustrationWhite HouseCocktailsParametersCocktail PartiesDaily Show Author:Jon Stewart
“I know that my job is to perform, it wouldn't be a very interesting show if I just came out one day and said, "I'm going to sit here in a ball and rock back and forth. And won't you join me for a half hour of sadness."” IfsKnowsSaidShowsJobsHoursInterestingHalfSadnessRocksOne DayBallsVery InterestingBack And ForthHalf Hours Author:Jon Stewart
“I'm too short to host a late-night talk show. It's like the bar at an amusement-park ride. You have to be six foot two or over.” TwoShowsNightFeetSixLateBarsParksHostAmusementToo ShortTalk ShowsLate NightAmusement Parks Author:Jon Stewart
“It's great having Bruce Springsteen on my show. We have so much in common! We're both from New Jersey, just from different neighborhoods. Sort of like how Martin Luther King and Margaret Mitchell both came from Atlanta. But from different neighborhoods.” DifferentShowsCommonKingsNeighborhoodLutherJerseyNew JerseyAtlantaSpringsteen Author:Jon Stewart
“When my syndicated show got canceled, the next day I still knew how to write jokes. That was a huge revelation. Because at first you think, "I won't have any shelter! What am I gonna do? The sun is hot. Very thirsty."” ThinkingWritingFirstsStillsShowsNextSunHugeJokesHotRevelationsShelterHomelessNext DayThirsty Author:Jon Stewart
“That's the beauty of our show. Comedy or politics. We're sort of a mix. A space age polymer of both. A synthetic comedy-like material.” ShowsAgeFunnyFunSpaceComedyMaterialsBeing FunnySyntheticPolymers Author:Jon Stewart
