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Quote by Doug Benson

“A message to parents who think legalizing weed will make their kids want to try it: they will anyway.”

Quote by Doug Benson

Author

Born on July 2, 1964, Doug Benson is an American comedian known for his unique humor style and self-deprecating humor. He has made a significant impact in the comedy world with his performances that often explore personal experiences and social phenomena in a light-hearted and humorous manner. more

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“The great thing about being up early on a Sunday is nothing.”

Great Things Sunday Up Early

Author:Doug Benson

“Marijuana: why forget something tomorrow when you can forget it today?”

Today Forget Tomorrow Marijuana Forget It

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“Has anybody here ever been driving along in their car, smoking a cigarette, and you flick it out the window, and you drive for a few miles, and you start to smell smoke, and you turn around, and you look in the backseat, and grandma is playing with herself?”

Looks Turns Car Window Smell Driving Miles Smoke Smoking Cigarette Grandma Backseat

Author:Doug Benson

“Stand-up is a very scary, very solitary profession, but you have to experience it to figure out if it's right for you.”

Ifs Figures Experience Scary Profession Solitary

Author:Doug Benson

“It's easier to do comedy with an audience, because their reactions tell you whether or not what your saying qualifies as comedy.”

Audience Comedy Easier Reactions

Author:Doug Benson

“The genius' behind the new Rocky movie decided to call it Rocky Balboa so that we'll probably forget that it's number six. Or Rocky Balboa can't count past five.”

Past Forget Numbers Behinds Five Genius Six Decided

Author:Doug Benson

“Big deal... the only cats that don't have three legs are the ones with two through zero legs.”

Two Bigs Three Deals Cat Legs Zero Big Deal Three Legs

Author:Doug Benson

“Most blacks will argue that they excel because of hard work, because of intellect, determination, sweat, blood, tears and risk.”

Hard Risk Blood Tears Hard Work Determination Intellect Arguing Sweat

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“Why would any woman agree to be on a show called Bridezillas? It's not like men would agree to be on Douchegroom.”

Men Shows Agree

Author:Doug Benson

“I like to go see a ball game. I'll have seven, eight, nine - 10 beers, and the second inning will roll around, and I gotta go.”

Games Balls Seven Eight Nine Beer Ball Games

Author:Doug Benson