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Quote by Conan O'Brien

“Tomorrow night President Obama will announce his new immigration plan. Obama's favorite part of his new immigration plan is that he gets to emigrate to another country. He's tired of all this.”

Quote by Conan O'Brien

Author

Conan O'Brien, born on April 18, 1963, is a renowned talk show host from the United States. Known for his unique sense of humor and engaging interaction with audiences, he has hosted several popular talk show programs. more

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“Analysts say Obama's new immigration plan will focus on deporting violent criminals. So, this could impact your fantasy football team.”

Fantasy Focus Plans Team Football Impact Criminals Violent Immigration Football Team Analysts Violent Criminals Fantasy Football

Author:Conan O'Brien

“Pope Francis announced that next year he is coming to the United States, or as Fox News is reporting it, 'Obama lets in yet another guy from South America.'”

Years States America Guy Next United United States News South Pope Foxes Next Year Other Guys Fox News South America

Author:Conan O'Brien

“President Obama has pledged $3 billion to aid poor nations. All of that $3 billion is going to the United States.”

States Nations President Poor United United States Aids Billions President Obama Poor Nations

Author:Conan O'Brien

“Scientists say the European space probe that landed on the comet has detected organic matter. This means there could be either life in space or a Whole Foods. We just don't know.”

Knows Mean Matter Whole Space Scientist Comets Whole Foods

Author:Conan O'Brien

“This week a group of activists, known as Anonymous, hacked the Twitter account of the KKK. The KKK is furious. They said Anonymous is just a bunch of cowards who don't have the courage to show their faces.”

Said Shows Faces Known Groups Week Accounts Bunch Coward Activist They Said Furious Hacked Kkk

Author:Conan O'Brien

“Yesterday the DEA raided several NFL teams suspected of giving prescription painkillers to their players. In its defense, the New York Jets' doctor said, 'We don't give painkillers to our players. We give them to our fans.'”

Giving Said Player Team Fans New York Doctors Defense Yesterday Nfl Jet Prescriptions Painkillers

Author:Conan O'Brien

“The Secret Service said there have been 40 fence-jumping incidents at the White House in the past five years. Half of them were intruders trying to get in. The other half was President Obama trying to get out.”

Trying Years Has Beens Said Past House President White Secret Half Five Five Years White House President Obama Fence Jumping Incidents Other Half Secret Service Intruders

Author:Conan O'Brien

“At the economic summit in China, Vladimir Putin is being accused of flirting with the first lady of China. Then again, Putin does have a history of not respecting boundaries.”

Firsts Doe Economic China Boundaries Flirting Accused Summit Putin First Lady Being Accused

Author:Conan O'Brien

“People in China criticized President Obama for chewing gum while entering the economic summit in Beijing. They're saying he looked like a rapper. Then again, to be fair, in China I look like a rapper.”

People Looks President Economic Fairs China President Obama Rapper Entering Summit Gum Chewing Beijing Chewing Gum

Author:Conan O'Brien

“President Obama and Vladimir Putin are both in China attending the same economic summit. Obama saw Putin and said, 'After those midterms, it's nice to finally see a friendly face.'”

Said Faces President Saws Nice Economic China Friendly President Obama Summit Putin Attending Midterms Friendly Faces

Author:Conan O'Brien