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“Certain relationships can just wear you down. So you mirror or reflect back- kind of like a pet, reflecting back what its master wants. This can seem easier in the moment: Whatever it takes to back this person's vibe down. The master does not have to be male. Sometimes he is, but not always. Whoever the master is, they know this, that people can be trained. Either with praise, shame, the fear of failure, or the fear of being gaslighted, the technique is a relationship of rewards and punishments. There is no unconditional love here. No, this kind of relationship is all about the master's conditions. Not joint respectful mutual conditions, but their conditions.” — Tori Amos

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Certain relationships can just wear you down. So you mirror or reflect back- kind of like a pet, reflecting back what its master wants. This can seem easier in the moment: Whatever it takes to back this person's vibe down. The master does not have to be male. Sometimes he is, but not always. Whoever the master is, they know this, that people can be trained. Either with praise, shame, the fear of failure, or the fear of being gaslighted, the technique is a relationship of rewards and punishments. There is no unconditional love here. No, this kind of relationship is all about the master's conditions. Not joint respectful mutual conditions, but their conditions.
— Tori Amos