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Nice Girls Don't Win: How I Burned It All Down to Claim My Power

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Parvati Shallow

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“I have been around for a very long time, and I've eavesdropped on many a learned man. The truth is, women will always confuse them. Witches or not, they're not sure how we work. Women are clearly in league with nature. Even our cycles follow those of the moon. We create life out of little and intuit things that men don't. We terrify them because we posses powers they aren't able to plunder. Because they'll never be able to do what we can, they decided long ago to declare us inferior.”

“We have, according to many commentators, a “mating crisis,” a “dating crisis,” a “marriage crisis,” or a “male loneliness crisis.” These are dimensions of the same core problem, however: Straight men are having an equality crisis. Too many refuse to contemplate the degree to which “normal” heterosexual relationships, both within and outside marriage, historically assumed men’s dominance and women’s subservience, men’s agency and control and women’s lack of agency and deference.”

“So many things can balk a woman from bearing (including a man who wields a powderless gun. Though I must say that in my whole life I’ve never heard a single husband take the blame for a barren house, not even when put to the proof with three childless wives in a row).”

“What if the work resisted restraint because it was not meant to be restrained? What if she had very nearly everything she needed for the book to take shape, except for the courage to let it find its own shape? She stopped wrestling with the work so she could dance with it instead. I watched the wheels turn right in front of me, and I saw in Austin a mind simultaneously at work and play. I saw a writer doing their job and a woman remembering who the hell she was and what she wanted.”

“I knew that if I wrote what I wanted to write, it would be the end of our next flm with Channel 4. But I found it impossible to keep quiet. ‘The Great Indian Rape- Trick’, Parts I and II, were published in Sunday . The second essay ended with these words: Bandit Queen the flm seriously jeopardizes Phoolan Devi’s life. It passes judgments that ought to be passed in Courts of Law. Not in Cinema Halls. The threads that connect Truth to Half- Truths to Lies could very quickly tighten into a noose around Phoolan Devi’s neck. Or put a bullet through her head. Or a knife in her back. While We- the- Audience peep saucer- eyed out of our little lives. Not remotely aware of the fact that our superf-cial sympathy, our ignorance of the facts and our intellectual sloth could grease her way to the gallows. We makes me sick. With that, obviously, I made myself a whole lot of enemies. Phoolan Devi went to court to try to stop the film.”