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Misadventurous

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S.A. Tawks

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“Without sufficient pull inwards, towards the sanctity of the couple relationship, the relationship can become lost, powerless, and vulnerable to many divisive factors including other people. Without sufficient pull outwards, into the world, we can become so selfish and inward-looking as a couple that we stop growing. The relationship can become stale and the people involved can become suffocated with their own togetherness.”

“When someone speaks to you, gripes at you, whines or cries or barks at you, resist the natural tendency to swiftly respond, and instead, listen carefully with the intent to honestly understand. The more you listen to comprehend exactly what the person is trying to communicate, the more you begin to know the individual and his or her concerns. As you grow to know the individual, the easier it is to care. This leads to greater love towards the person. So to restate a truth: the more you listen, the more you understand. The more you understand, the more you care. The more you care, the more you love. And the more you love, the stronger your relationship will be.”

“But how do you see you?" she asked. "Ever read The Brothers Karamazov?" I asked. "Once, a long time ago." "Well, toward the end, Alyosha is speaking to a young student named Kolya Krasotkin. And he says, Kolya, you're going to have a miserable future. But overall, you'll have a happy life." Two beers down, I hesitated before opening my third. "When I first read that, I didn't know what Alyosha meant," I said. "How was it possible for a life of misery to be happy overall? But then I understood, that misery could be limited to the future." "I have no idea what you're talking about." "Neither do I," I said. "Not yet.”

“Why, the whole world of knowledge is not worth that child's prayer to 'dear, kind God'! I say nothing of the sufferings of grown-up people, they have eaten the apple, damn them, and the devil take them all! But these little ones! The Brothers Karamazov Ivan to Alyosha, on the suffering and torture of children, " Book V - Pro and Contra, Chapter 4 - Rebellion.”