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Tori Hope Petersen

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“As a kid in foster homes, she had a nightly dilemma. Night wasn't always the safest time. Should she sleep with the lights off so she was harder to find in the dark? Or should she sleep with the lights on so she could see who was coming to get her? Some families forced her to shut the lights off to save electricity. Before she got older and learned better, that would send her into a tailspin of wondering, late into the night, where and how electricity was saved. You can't see electricity. Except for lightning. So just where and how was it saved? She imagined giant metal storage bins somewhere in the country filled with shooting lightning bolts.”

“Unlike kids in family homes, kids in foster care today rely on a separate state agency, Residential Child Care Investigations, to look into reports of suspected abuse or neglect. That agency has a tendency to downgrade abuse reports without ever investigating them. During four months in 2019, the agency ruled out nearly half of the more than nine hundred abuse reports it received- with no investigation whatsoever.”

“Kalton Harris says it's pretty common for young men like Dontay to drop out of programs designed to help them. All the barriers to good jobs, and all the other barriers that exist out in the world outside the program, are part of the reason, he says, but there is another: they have been deeply hurt at a young age, and they don't know how to deal with it.”

“It's okay not to love us. " I kept my face buried in my pillow, yet my ears were on full alert. "And I'm not going to say that I love you, because I haven't known you long enough to feel that way. I like you very much and I want you to be my daughter forever, but love is something that grows with shared experiences. I feel the buds of love growing, but it hasn't blossomed yet." I could not believe she was being so honest. She took a long breath. "There is nothing we can say to make you believe we'll be here for you. You'll only learn it by living with us year after year.”