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A Saint and a Sinner: The Rise and Fall of a Beloved Catholic Priest

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Stephen H. Donnelly

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“I, for one, was outraged at the accused who trampled the trust of a child. I would never watch a priest take a minor upstairs to his bedroom, not for any reason! Nor would I ever cover for him. My anger was directed at the bishops, too, for their abysmal response. It was like we were living in a house that had rotted up to the rafters. Where would we begin to make repairs? Should we just knock it down and start again? Or should we simply move far, far away?”

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Book:A Saint and a Sinner: The Rise and Fall of a Beloved Catholic Priest
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“On September tenth, after a busy day at the parish, and without any forethought, I stopped at a liquor store before I headed upstate to the Villa. I wouldn’t allow myself to recognize the insanity of drinking a bottle of wine as I drove to a rehab facility. I flashbacked to my father’s beer cans, in paper bags, between his legs as he drove. I was sure God was tapping on my shoulder, but I wasn’t responding. I coasted comfortably on autopilot, one of the most dangerous modes a human being can find themselves.”

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Book:A Saint and a Sinner: The Rise and Fall of a Beloved Catholic Priest
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“Remorse hit me like a sledgehammer. I felt sick inside as I counted all the people I had let down. My brain quickly ran through several scenarios. Had I irreparably damaged my relationship with Charlie? Would Camilla finally abandon me? Would the Church blacklist me? In the court of public opinion, would I be considered a persona non grata?”

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Book:A Saint and a Sinner: The Rise and Fall of a Beloved Catholic Priest
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“There’s a certain mystique about a priest’s uniform; black slacks, black shirt, and Roman collar that evokes different responses from different people—sometimes reverence, other times disdain. Being perceived as a pillar of the community can be a heady experience for a new priest, and one’s ego needs to be checked continually. The collar can also be an aphrodisiac for certain women, single or married, who are attracted to and flirt with the “unattainable” priest.”

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Book:A Saint and a Sinner: The Rise and Fall of a Beloved Catholic Priest
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“When he returned from St. John Vianney, Charlie felt fully vindicated. “They couldn’t find one thing wrong with me, Stephen.” All I could think was, “Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.” I knew in my heart; I could not even cast a pebble.”

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Book:A Saint and a Sinner: The Rise and Fall of a Beloved Catholic Priest
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“Suddenly, there was no anger, no tears, or ultimatums. All that remained was the realization that the dream had withered and died. I guess that’s what happens to love when the expectations are too high, there are a plethora of insurmountable obstacles, and too much at stake. Even fairy tales have unexpected endings; not everyone lives happily ever after. For years, I had been swimming in a sea of other people’s expectations. Perhaps this breakup was the only way I could genuinely rediscover myself.”

ForgivenessMemoirRedemptionCatholicismBiographiesAddiction Recovery12 Step Program
Book:A Saint and a Sinner: The Rise and Fall of a Beloved Catholic Priest
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“The old cliché, “There are no words,” is regarded by many as an empty platitude, but I beg to differ. Well-meaning people use the expression over and over because it’s true. We don’t have the language to describe the grief that comes in waves, swallows us up, and keeps us on our knees. There is no road map through grief: it takes time, patience, and love for the soul to heal and reemerge. A deep faith in God and the belief that, as promised, we will indeed see our loved ones again in heaven has kept many people anchored until such time as they can right the ship and find the joy in living again.”

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Book:A Saint and a Sinner: The Rise and Fall of a Beloved Catholic Priest
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“It took me two relapses,” I shared one evening at an AA meeting, “but I had my last drink in 2002 after I stared down my fears. Some of you may have been dealt a bad hand in life in one way or another, but that doesn’t mean you can’t reshuffle the cards.”

ForgivenessMemoirRedemptionCatholicismBiographiesAddiction Recovery12 Step Program
Book:A Saint and a Sinner: The Rise and Fall of a Beloved Catholic Priest
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