“I sometimes feel like a slap when I hear the word functional. How much does a counselor know about your own life? Do not feel too much, do this, do that, these are the tools to process emotions, these are the tools to do this, do that, what the fucking tragedy. Isn’t the whole purpose of existence is to feel and feel more and a bit more? There is no logical rationale on why one should wait for years for a person. Maybe I did not feel the need to find a reason. In a life where I try to find the reason before opening a 30 second video, wasn’t that something that’s enough. Love is not supposed to be rational. When I feel, I feel. I feel a lot. And to doubt the love I had makes me doubt everything I had. Was anything real then, if not this? I do not know what I am feeling, but whatever it is, it is heavy. I did not know I had the capacity to feel this much and I did. I read once there are more atoms of hydrogen in a spoon than there are spoons on the earth. At that time it seemed very vague and funny, trivial but funny. But now that you are gone this is making me feel the heaviness of one spoon because a mare spoon is holding too many incomparable things. I hold too much of you inside of me, I hold too many memories inside of me that I am somehow on the verge of blasting but yet somehow I am not full. The waves of your memories come again and again. These tears are a witness that I loved you and I loved you well.”
Quote by Hana Z.
Work
Grief as it is: a published journal of love and grief
Browse quotes and source details for this work. more
Author
You May Also Like
Source: Grief as it is: a published journal of love and grief
Source: Falling Animals
“Mother, What doesn't share our grief is not us.”
Source: Sacrament of Bodies
Source: Not in My Book
“There are times when God closes certain doors to allow you to evolve.”
Source: Beyond the Closed Door: Unique Keys to Unlock Destinies
Source: Solutions and Other Problems
Source: Sisters in the Wind
Source: On Democracies and Death Cults: Israel and the Future of Civilization
“A story that lingers like a voice in the next room, half-heard and impossible to forget.”
Source: The Uninvited: A Haunting and Supernatural Literary Mystery Inspired by True Events