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“When a man gets serious about changing he has to be willing to look at the choices he is making every day, from the most trivial to the most significant. He has to accept that no one and nothing other than him is determining what he does. If he backslides into drinking, if he returns to abusive behavior, if he cheats on his partner, it's because that's what he decided to do. In short: His change depends on his willingness to accept complete responsibility for his own actions. He has to stop blaming them on you, on his addic tion, on his childhood, or on anything else.” — Lundy Bancroft
When a man gets serious about changing he has to be willing to look at the choices he is making every day, from the most trivial to the most significant.
He has to accept that no one and nothing other than him is determining what he does. If he backslides into drinking, if he returns to abusive behavior, if he cheats on his partner, it's because that's what he decided to do. In short:
His change depends on his willingness to accept complete responsibility for his own actions. He has to stop blaming them on you, on his addic tion, on his childhood, or on anything else.