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“Remember! X looks abject-lovingly at Y; Y is irritated by mounting self-reproaches, which are resented as being undeserved; Y feels compelled to be brutal to X. Sadism, hostility an essential element in love. Therefore it's important that love be a transaction of hostilities. Lesson: not to surrender one's heart where it's not wanted.” — Susan Sontag

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Remember! X looks abject-lovingly at Y; Y is irritated by mounting self-reproaches, which are resented as being undeserved; Y feels compelled to be brutal to X. Sadism, hostility an essential element in love. Therefore it's important that love be a transaction of hostilities. Lesson: not to surrender one's heart where it's not wanted.
— Susan Sontag