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“There’s a Barry spider in oor bathroom called Boris. He keeps fawin intae the bath. Ah keep takin him oot n pittin him oan the windae ledge. But whenever ye come back, he’s in the bath again, tryin tae climb oot, up the slope, then slidin back. Ye’d think the gadge might learn, ken?” — Irvine Welsh

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There’s a Barry spider in oor bathroom called Boris. He keeps fawin intae the bath. Ah keep takin him oot n pittin him oan the windae ledge. But whenever ye come back, he’s in the bath again, tryin tae climb oot, up the slope, then slidin back. Ye’d think the gadge might learn, ken?
— Irvine Welsh