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“An abuser who does not relinquish his core entitlements will not remain non-abusive. This may be the single most overlooked point regarding abusers and change. The progress that such a man appears to be making is an illusion. If he reserves the right to bully his partner, to protect even one specific priviledge, he is keeping the abuse option open. And if he keeps it open, he will gradually revert to using it more and more until his prior range of controlling behaviors has been restored to it's full glory.” — Lundy Bancroft

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An abuser who does not relinquish his core entitlements will not remain non-abusive. This may be the single most overlooked point regarding abusers and change. The progress that such a man appears to be making is an illusion. If he reserves the right to bully his partner, to protect even one specific priviledge, he is keeping the abuse option open. And if he keeps it open, he will gradually revert to using it more and more until his prior range of controlling behaviors has been restored to it's full glory.
— Lundy Bancroft