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Quote by Asa Don Brown

“Focus on something specific they said and ask more about it. Read through the other person's texts and pick out words that seem important. Then, ask them to elaborate on that. This will show them you're listening, and it can also help them sort through their complicated feelings.”

Quote by Asa Don Brown

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Asa Don Brown

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“You have to help your partner come through for you. Tell them how you'd like them to be. Help them win. Help your partner succeed, because it's in your interest to act like a team. In our individualistic culture, your partner either comes through for you or they don't. But when you begin thinking relationally, ecologically, you realize that you have something to say about how things go between you. "What can I do to help you come through for me?" is an entirely relational question. Thinking like a team is the clear antidote to thinking like two individuals. It's a shift from "I don't like how you're talking to me" to "Honey, I want to hear what you're saying. Could you please lower your voice so I can hear it?" A shift from "I need more sex" to "We both deserve a healthy sex life. What should we do about it?”

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Book:Us: Getting Past You and Me to Build a More Loving Relationship
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“You do,” Bellona agreed absently, still working at getting her own hair free. Jeez, how many pins did she have in there? “Need a haircut that is.” Elliot’s eyes flicked to Sully, seeking his opinion. Sully pinched his lips together to keep from smiling and minutely shook his head in the negative. He liked Elliot’s hair longer than regulation. Elliot’s smile shifted into a smug smirk he hid by taking another sip from his canteen.”

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Book:Imperfect Illusions
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