“Withholding speech, in other words, can signify domination: the one who says less wins the emotional game, which is exactly why self-help guides aimed at straight women ... advise women to meet men’s silence with silence (don’t call back, don’t respond to emails, and so on). Straight women are essentially being told to use silence to empower themselves by fanning the kind of desire that, as we have established, arises from the other’s enigma.” SilenceSelf HelpEthics Book:The Ethics of Opting Out: Queer Theory's Defiant Subjects Source: The Ethics of Opting Out: Queer Theory's Defiant Subjects