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Quote by Melissa Febos

“Our lives are a long series of acquiring and then sloughing narratives.”

Author

Melissa Febos is a contemporary writer known for her unique narrative style and profound insights into personal experiences. Her works often explore themes such as gender, identity, and memory. more

“I think we all are born inside of our parents' narratives. We stay there for a good while. We are taught their narratives about everything: their marriage, the world, God, gender, identity, etcetera. Then, at some point, our own narrative develops too much integrity to live inside that story. We don't ever fully escape it, but we move into our own stories.”

Thinking World Stories Moving Parent Born Too Much Identity Taught Integrity Gender Narrative Gender Identity Etcetera

Author:Melissa Febos

“When I was a kid, I was told that I had a biological father, but that he didn't have much importance. I had an adoptive father who was present, who loved me, who was up to the task. And he was. So, I didn't question that story, until I was thirty-two, and suddenly realized that I was curious, that he did have something to do with me.”

Two Stories Kids Father Tasks Importance Curious Thirty Biological Fathers

Author:Melissa Febos

“The lovers enter into a story together - "this how we met, this is how we were meant for each other" - and then at some point (in my experience, at least), the story splits, and they no longer share it. Then, you either change the story, or you break up. I've always broken up.”

Stories Together Break Share Broken Lovers Mets Splits Broken Up

Author:Melissa Febos

“All our stories are part invention - the way we've decided to make sense of what has happened.”

Way Stories Happened Decided Invention Make Sense

Author:Melissa Febos

“Sometimes I see my students, especially the ones with a gift for the lyrical, reaching far outside the realm of their own experience for language and images. I understand this impulse. We think, in the beginning, that striking exotic words together will create something entirely new. That we must be worldly in our vocabulary. We idolize the styles of other writers and don't trust or perhaps yet know our own.”

Thinking Knows Sometimes Together Language Style Students Impulse Realms Reaching Worldly Vocabulary Exotic Don't Trust Lyrical

Author:Melissa Febos

“You don't have to write like David Foster Wallace or James Baldwin or Maggie Nelson - indeed, you shouldn't. Those writers are doing it better than you ever could.”

Writing Better Than You Nelson Maggie

Author:Melissa Febos

“I've always looked very closely at people, and seen a lot; that was true even when I was a kid. That's what made me a good domme, but it's also what makes me well suited to being a writer, and a teacher.”

People Wells Made Kids Teacher

Author:Melissa Febos

“I can still discern people's weaknesses, but it doesn't make me want to exploit them; it makes me want to hug them.”

People Want Stills I Can Weakness Hug Exploits

Author:Melissa Febos

“Early in my career as a domme, I both admired and feared becoming one of those career dommes. I saw, in myself, and in some other women in that industry, the way that sex work could eclipse the other parts of your personality, the way that I started to feel as if I wasn't qualified to do anything else. I had always known that I wanted to be a writer, and I stopped writing for a time while I was domming; the experience subsumed my other interests, and it scared me. Now, however, I have nothing but admiration for them.”

Ifs Way Feels Writing Wanted Sex Interest Known Careers Saws Personality Industry Becoming Scared Admiration Qualified Eclipse Sex Work Becoming One

Author:Melissa Febos

“Anyone who makes a life of what they love is a hero to me, and it's important for those people to be visible in every kind of life, every kind of love, every kind of work.”

People Kind Important Love Is Hero Visible Kinds Of Love

Author:Melissa Febos

Quote by Melissa Febos

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