“Anger, resentment, jealousy, desire for revenge, lust, greed, antagonisms, and rivalries are the obvious signs that I have left home. And that happens quite easily. When I pay careful attention to what goes on in my mind from moment to moment, I come to the disconcerting discovery that there are very few moments during the day when I am really free from these dark emotions, passions and feelings. Constantly falling back into an old trap, before I am even fully aware of it, I find myself wondering why someone hurt me, rejected me, or didn't pay attention to me. Without realizing it, I find myself brooding about someone else's success, my own loneliness, and the way the world abuses me. Despite my conscious intentions, I often catch myself daydreaming about becoming rich, powerful, and very famous. All of these mental games reveal to me the fragility of my faith that I am the Beloved One on whom God's favor rests. I am so afraid of being disliked, blamed, put aside, passed over, ignored, persecuted, and killed, that I am constantly developing strategies to defend myself and thereby assure myself of the love I think I need and deserve. And in so doing I move far away from my father's home and choose to dwell in a "distant country.”
Quote by Henri J.M. Nouwen
Work
The Return of the Prodigal Son: A Story of Homecoming
Browse quotes and source details for this work. more
Author
You May Also Like
Source: I, Eliza Hamilton
Source: Home Torn
Source: Beach Music
“Why is it that my heart hurts for that one miracle that did not happen?”
Source: Living with Joy: Keys to Personal Power and Spiritual Transformation
“Sometimes, it only seems that the hurt wins.”
Source: Tattoos on the Heart: The Power of Boundless Compassion
Source: Turtles All the Way Down
“Often it is not the act that hurts you but the story you tell yourself afterwards.”