Home / Quotes / Quote by Bill Maher

Quote by Bill Maher

“Guns aren't just a tool of last resort. They're awesome. That's why people stroke them. And name them, and take pictures with them. You guys aren't just firearm enthusiasts — you're ammosexuals. And before you try and deny you have some sort of unnatural romantic relationship with your gun, consider this. You're taking it out to dinner! Because it completes you. Get a room.”

Quote by Bill Maher

Author

Bill Maher is an American comedian, political commentator, and television host. Known for his sharp political satire and humor, he is best recognized for hosting ABC's 'Politically Incorrect'. Born on January 20, 1956, Maher's career spans television, film, and stage performances, as well as writing and producing. more

You May Also Like

“Mitt Romney we think is going run again. He says he has no plans to run, but he said if he did run, this time things would turn out differently. Yes they would. This time he would get his ass kicked by a woman.”

Ifs Thinking Said Running Turns Plans Ass Romney

Author:Bill Maher

“Sarah Palin said perhaps the most irresponsible thing I've ever heard any politician say. She said, 'The only thing that stops a bad guy with a nuke is a good guy with a nuke.' You think she realizes that nuking Russia might not be good for someone who can see Russia from her house?”

Thinking Said Might Guy House Realizing Heard Politician Be Good Russia Bad Guys Irresponsible Good Guy Palin Nukes

Author:Bill Maher

“Karl Rove thinks we shouldn’t have Hillary Clinton in the White House because she fell and hit her head a couple years ago, spent three days in the hospital, and maybe she has brain damage. You know, I don’t recall the Republicans being this concerned with mental fitness during the years when Reagan was talking to house plants in the White House.”

Thinking Knows Years Three House White Brain Talking Couple Republican Concerned Years Ago Plant Clinton Damage Hospitals White House Recalls

Author:Bill Maher

“Ted Cruz, of course, was furious that the big storm back east shut down the government. He said, 'That my job!' But you know, there is a big difference between Ted Cruz and snow. Both are white and everyone’s sick of them – but eventually snow goes away.”

Knows Said Bigs Government Jobs Courses Differences White Sick Storm East Snow Furious Cruz

Author:Bill Maher

“I know climate change is a hoax – of course – but places that have never seen this type of winter weather got hit by it. More than a half a million southerners have been left in the dark --- and then the storm hit.”

Knows Has Beens Courses Left Dark Half Millions Type Climate Winter Climate Change Storm Weather Southerner Hoaxes Winter Weather

Author:Bill Maher

“New Rule: This Valentine’s Day Americans must remember that politicians are like a box of chocolates. We bite into them to find out what's on the inside only to discover that Democrats are too often soft and gooey and Republicans are mostly nuts.”

America Remember Politician Republican Democrat Boxes Chocolate Bites Nuts Valentine Valentine's Day Box Of Chocolates

Author:Bill Maher

“A new biography came out that says that in high school Obama was a huge pothead … Mitt Romney had to respond to this and said, ‘It is appalling that Obama spent his teenage years goofing around and smoking pot when he should have been pinning down gay kids and cutting their hair.”

Should Years Has Beens Said Kids School Cutting Huge Hair Gay High School Should Have Smoking Pot Biographies Teenage Romney Should Have Been Teenage Years Smoking Pot Potheads Goofing Around

Author:Bill Maher

“Mitt Romney comes from a Mormon background. I don't know how many wives he has. I'm not saying that I believe in that, I'm just saying he was born on a Mormon compound. I'm not a 'Wifer' but for some reason he's never shown his original marriage certificate.”

Knows Believe Reason I Believe Born Know How Wife Originals I Believe In Backgrounds Romney Compounds Just Saying Certificates

Author:Bill Maher

“Why did Mitt Romney strap his dog to the roof of his car? Could it be because his station wagon was full of wives?”

Wife Dog Car Stations Roof Romney Wagons

Author:Bill Maher

“Mitt Romney, who is on record saying that he would not waste money going after bin Laden, and on record saying he would not violate Pakistan's border to get bin Laden, this week said, 'Of course I would have gotten bin Laden.' Even his Etch-A-Sketch went, seriously?”

Said Courses Records Week Waste Borders Pakistan Romney Bin Laden Etch A Sketch

Author:Bill Maher