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Lies That Princess Told You

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Caitlin Rush

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“He saw into me, but still smiled and felt warm without the pity or anger or desire to pull away that’s common when people find out how really busted up you are. For as much as people say they care, you really find out how much of it’s a lie when you show someone the wounds you carry. They think they understand because they were disappointed once, but I’ve learned that those who brag about charity are usually the least charitable.”

“Grief is like a deep, dark hole. It calls like a siren: Come to me, lose yourself here. And you fight it and you fight it and you fight it, but when you finally do succumb and jump down into it, you can't quite believe how deep it is. It feels as if this is how you will live for the rest of your life, falling. Terrified and devastated, until you yourself die. But that is the mirage. That is grief's dizzying spell. The fall isn't never-ending. It does have a ground floor.”

“If I’d realised how much that pressure would build inside me, the slow descent into a dull existence, days blemished with concern for my dad and whether I’m looking after him properly — well, I would have stayed out late some nights, lost my virginity at sixteen instead of still having it, developed a fondness for alcohol, sat at bars, smoked weed, danced at clubs, and turned strangers into friends.”