“During this time of almost continuous despair, I often told Morrigan about my recurring fantasy: breaking up with her (or vice versa), quitting my job, moving to some cheap, shitty little one-room apartment in Mustamäe, staying isolated indoors for months on end, eating only canned beans, drinking copious amounts of red wine, talking to cockroaches, and slowly going insane—until one day, inspired by Philipp Mainländer, I’d build a pedestal out of copies of my novel and hang myself from the ceiling.” DespairPhilipp Mainländer Book:Broken: Twenty Pieces Source: Broken: Twenty Pieces