“When your Super Bowl guests arrive, they should find a mound of potato chips large enough to conceal a pony sitting in front of the television. For nutritional balance, you should also put out a bowl of carrot sticks. If you have no carrot sticks, you can use pinecones, or used electrical fuses, because nobody will eat them anyway. This is no time for nutritional balance: This is the Super Bowl, for God's sake.” IfsShouldEnoughUseUsedFrontsTelevisionBalanceSittingSticksSakeGuestsBowlsChipsPotatoesElectricalSuper BowlCarrotsFusePoniesPotato Chips Author:Dave Barry
“We really didn't have the option of being couch potatoes when I was growing up. There were only three television channels and the only kid's programming was on Saturday morning. We always played outside until we could hear Mom calling us (not by cell phone but with her hands cupped around her mouth) that it was dinner time.” HandsKidsThreeMorningGrowing UpGrowingTelevisionMomCallingMouthsPhonesDinnerCellsProgrammingSaturdayPotatoesCouchesCell PhoneSaturday MorningDinner Time Author:Jeff Foxworthy
“Skiers make the best lovers because they don't sit in front of a television like couch potatoes. They take a risk and they wiggle their behinds. They also meet new people on the ski lift.” PeopleBehindsRiskFrontsTelevisionLoversLiftsPotatoesCouchesBest LoveSkisMeeting New PeopleSkiers Author:Ruth Westheimer