“Once you’ve recognized someone you’ve met as secure, remember not to make impulsive decisions about whether s/he is right for you. Remind yourself that you might feel bored at first—after all, there is less drama when your attachment system isn’t activated. Give it some time. Chances are, if you are anxious, you will automatically interpret calmness in the relationship as a lack of attraction. A habit of years is not easy to shed. But if you hold out a little longer, you may start to appreciate a calm attachment system and all the advantages it has to offer.” LoveRelationship Book:Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love Source: Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love
“Basically, secure people feel comfortable with intimacy and are usually warm and loving; anxious people crave intimacy, are often preoccupied with their relationships, and tend to worry about their partner’s ability to love them back; avoidant people equate intimacy with a loss of independence and constantly try to minimize closeness.” LoveAttached Book:Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love Source: Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love