“I like my tea like I like my men,” I say. With the last name “Grey.” But I realize that’s too forward, so I add, “Black.” He raises an eyebrow. “I mean, not that I exclusively like black men,” I say, trying to recover. “I like other kinds of tea. And men.” “Have you ever tasted...white tea, Anna?” Humour Book:Fifty-one Shades: A Parody Source: Fifty-one Shades: A Parody
“My shift isn’t over until six,” I say glumly. “Hold on,” he says. He pulls a Blackberry from his coat pocket and taps out a text. It buzzes, and he taps out another text before stashing it back in his pocket. “I think you can take the rest of the afternoon off.” “I only have a week left, but my boss would kill me,” I say. “I’m your boss, Anna.” “What do you mean?” There’s that smile again, the one with all those teeth. “I just bought Walmart,” he says.” Humour Book:Fifty-one Shades: A Parody Source: Fifty-one Shades: A Parody
“For the first time since he showed up in my checkout lane, I let my eyes wander the full length of his body. The bulge in his running down the side of his pants leg is quite noticeable; either he has a banana in his pocket, or he’s happy to see me. Then I notice a similar bulge running down the side of his other pants leg. Either he has two bananas in his pockets, or he has two erections.” Humour Book:Fifty-one Shades: A Parody Source: Fifty-one Shades: A Parody