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Eliza Crewe Books

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Crushed

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“They say curiosity killed the cat but I am unconcerned. I am smarter, though slightly less evil, than any cat.”

Humor Evil Meda

Author:Eliza Crewe

“What do you say to your best friend when you stand at the gates of the gates of hell? Nothing. If it’s your best friend, she already knows.”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“I hear myself laughing, screeching, cackling. The world is red hot and pulsing. On fire [...] I stroll down the corridor and the flickering fluorescents celebrate my passing, humming in praise. I spin, bow and hum along. Bloody footprints trail; bloody fingers smear the walls.”

Crazy Bloodlust Dina

Book:Cracked

Source: Cracked

“It’s illegal, you know,” he murmurs. “Stealing.” I clear my throat. “Stealing?” “My heart. I could have you arrested.” I snort. “For that tiny thing? I’d get a misdemeanor at most.”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“I laugh. “How exactly do you see this…” I wave between the two of us, unable to come up with a descriptor “Beautiful friendship?” he supplies with a devilish grin. “…going?” I finish, ignoring him. “Us being mortal enemies and all.” “I prefer the term ‘star-crossed lovers.’” I snort. “Regardless, it can’t end well.” “The best romances don’t.”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“Rotten boys with their rotten eyes with their ridiculous rotten eyelashes. They suck a girl in, a pair of Venus fly-traps. No, Venus eye-traps.”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“That’s what I get for playing with fire,” he grumbles, rubbing his head. It can’t hurt too badly – his head is far too hard. “And here I always thought I was the one playing with fire. You being the bad boy.” “Nope,” he says, dropping down beside me. “The one playing with fire is the one most likely to get burned.”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“Maybe the problem is that demons belong with demons. Because they’re both takers. One takes from the other but she doesn’t miss it because she’s taking just as much from him. Like children with straws in each other’s milkshakes.” He pauses. “They would be as sneaky and mean in love as they are in everything else; but they’d also both be full and happy.”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“No, I should kill him. He said himself he would eventually go back to the demons. But he turns long-lashed eyes on me, full of entreaty, as if he were saying: please, please let me come murder the molester with you. How do you say “no” to eyes like those? They are a magical combination of sex and puppy. Better than it sounds, I promise.”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“Forget them, Meda. Forget her.” He reaches up and puts his hand on the side of my face, tugging it toward him. “I like you as you are. Good, evil, whatever. All I care about is that you’re alive. Please, Meda.”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“You are a total nerd.” Not what he’s expecting, the darkness wiped away by a startled laugh. “What?” “Why else would you possibly know that?” I say it like I’m piecing together a puzzle – and I’m appalled by the picture it’s making. “You’re a nerd. A complete nerd. You nerdified sex. That just happened.”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“He doesn’t back down under my accusations. Instead he leans in, his big frame curving over me like a wave. “I would do all that and more.” His tone betrays a carefully restrained ferocity, and I see in him, shifting and fluttering, behind his eyes the monster I’ve always known is there. It makes my breath catch, the beautiful horror of it. He doesn’t try to hide it, if anything he leans in closer, filling my vision until he fills the world. Him and his dark devil’s eyes.”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“A loyal demon? Who knew,” Jo jeers, and I want to hit her. “No,” Armand’s voice lashes out. “It’s predictably selfish.”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“You can love a monster, it can even love you back, but that doesn’t change its nature. This isn’t Beauty and the Beast where my kiss would transform the monster to a prince. If anything, it’s Shrek, and his kiss brings out the ogre in me.”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“Naivety is cured with time. Stupidity is terminal.”

Fatal Jo Meda Chi

Book:Cracked

Source: Cracked

“She regards me the same way I would a cat – like I’m distasteful, occasionally entertaining, and not to be trusted not to pee on the rug. Which is completely unfair – I only thought about it once.”

Crushed Meda Zee Eliza Crewe

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“Stupid Crusaders with their stupid rules. For a homicidal group, they’re appallingly restrictive. No, Meda, you can’t leave campus. No, Meda, you know we have a curfew. No, Meda, you can’t eat that guy.”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“Some might call me a “tease”, but don’t believe it. “Tease” implies that I owe him something, that I should feel guilty. As if my flirtation is forced on him and he merely tolerates it for an eventual pay-out. That’s bullshit. We both have goals in our little game; why should his goal (sex) take priority over mine (to mess with his head)? Is it because he’s a man? In that case I must object on principle. Superhero Meda establishing gender-equality one almost-kiss at a time!”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“Because the dumb slut slept with him, and he’s too nice to–” WHAM, out of nowhere he nose-butts me in the fist!”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“I suppose it should bother me to be so hated but, without it, I wouldn’t have the delight of torturing them with my presence. What can I say? My cheerful spirit can’t help but spot silver linings.”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“Get him! My hormones scream. Don’t fall for it, my brain cautions. Pretty! They whine. Stupid hormones. Calm down, hormones. We are just pumping him – (really brain, you chose the word pumping?) – for information. He is literally evil. We need to keep our distance.”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“I nod and wave to my enemies like Miss America, pausing to blow kisses at the worst of them as I work my way across the cafeteria with a plate loaded with horridly healthy food.”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“You said you’d cooperate.” I knew I’d regret my promise, just not quite this soon. “You don’t wear pink!” “Yeah, well, no one thinks I’m in league with the devil.” She shoves it into my chest. I narrow my eyes. “I do.”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“My hands twitch and wiggle. Jo sees them, shakes her head and mouths, “Sit on your hands.” She can’t be serious. As if my butt would stop my hands even if it could. Does she not realize it’s in league with the rest of me?”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“I hear Jo in my head trying to douse the fire in my heart. “Be good, Meda.” Good, good, good, good, good. The word plays in a loop until it means nothing. I’ve been good and they refuse to feed me. I’ve been good and they won’t train me. I’ve been good and they changed the locks. I’ve been good and they want to send me away.”

Book:Crushed

Source: Crushed

“Crush! Kill! And above all - cackle!”

Book:Cracked

Source: Cracked

“The pauses make it better. They make me wonder whether he's going to come to me, like the anticipation before a kiss. Will he or won't he? But this is not a love story.”

Book:Cracked

Source: Cracked

“5 stars = If I weren't taken, I'd marry this book and have its delightful little book babies. 4 stars = goin' steady (or whatever you crazy kids call it these days). So good I'd read it again. 3 stars = A great, one-time fling. I enjoyed it but it probably won't be a reread. 2 stars and below = The pretty thing didn't make it past the pick-up line. I don't rate these because I don't finish them.”

Humor Personal Ratings

Author:Eliza Crewe