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“Heartbreak isn't as lethal as the name implies, you know. Maybe it feels that way at the time, but I swear it isn't. You've seen Gwen and me both rebound from it eventually. I don't regret anything leading up to it, and I doubt Gwen does either. It's life, Elaine. Getting hurt, picking yourself up, trying again. You're so focused on the ending sometimes that I don't think you know how to appreciate the during.”

“Her name is Queen Theodosia, and if you won’t apologize for disrespecting her, I’ll let her men have you and I’ll describe your last moments to your wife so that she knows how pathetically you died.” Mattin grunts, eyes dropping away. “I apologize,” he says through gritted teeth. Søren looks tempted to extract something more sincere out of him, but that would hardly be productive. I clear my throat. “I accept your apology,” I say coldly. “I hope you come to see that a woman can wield power beyond what’s between her legs—for your daughter’s sake if nothing else.”

“I will die drowning; it has always been know. This was my first vision, long before I knew it for what it was, and I've had it so many times now that I know each instant by heart. Where most visions are ephemeral things, shifting and changing in different lights and at different angles, this one is always so solid that it leaves its bruises on my mind and soul long after it ends. The water will be cold against my skin. It will rush around me like a storm, teasing my hair in different directions until it clouds my vision. I won't be able to see a thing. I will want to kick up to the surface, to breathe the air I know is only a few meters away, but I will stay frozen and sink lower and lower in my whirlpool until my feet finally touch soft sand. My eyes will be closed, and everything around me will be darkness. My lungs will burn, burn, burn until I fear they are going to burst. The surface will be so close, I could reach it if I just kick up...but I won't. I won't want to. In a week or a year or a decade, I will die drowning. When I do, it will be a choice.”

“Is that all you want?” At that, he reaches for me, and pulls me toward him so that we’re standing face to face. “Well, I want you, but I didn’t think I had to say that,” he says. “In whatever capacity I can have you, for however long you want me, I’m yours.” I smile, rolling onto the balls of my feet to kiss him softly. “Yana Crebesti,” I murmur against his lips. “No matter what comes.”

“You aren’t useless. You have your mind, you have your determination. You can still probably wield a sword better than half of Cress’s army, I’d bet, depth perception or no. Stay and fight and show her that she didn’t ruin you.” Erik swallows. For a moment, he says nothing, but eventually he nods his head. “I don’t suppose you could heal me, Heron?” he asks, though he sounds like he already knows the answer. “I can’t make you a new eye,” Heron says, his voice pained. “But I can try to help with healing your other one.” “What about you, Artemisia?” Erik asks. “Any illusion you could cast to hide it?” “Nothing permanent. I’m sorry,” she says. “And nothing that would give you back your vision.” “Ah well,” Erik says, his voice still quavering. “I had a few good years of being handsome. It’s more than most get.” It’s an attempt at a joke, but no one laughs. “You’re still handsome,” Heron says quietly. Erik laughs, the sound hard. “I’m monstrous,” he says. “You’re brave,” Heron says, louder this time. “And steadfast. And you fight for your people—for what you know is right no matter what it costs you. You are, without a doubt, the handsomest man I’ve ever seen, and if you try to say otherwise one last time, I will break your nose as well, you vain ass.”

“You are sweet and docile and dumb.” I recoil. “Excuse me?” She smirks. “Another role to play. You’re very good at playing roles.” I’m tempted to look at Søren, who’s too busy rowing to talk but can certainly hear every word. “Let them believe you are dim,” Artemisia continues. “The King, his court, your suitors. If they believe you to be an idiot, they will underestimate you. Let them.”

“I’m sorry,” I say, bringing my hand over my mouth. “I’m so sorry, Erik.” Erik shakes his head. “I’m useless to you now,” he says. “I have no army for you, Theo. I can’t lead a battalion. I’m not even sure I could lead the way out of this tent.” “You’re blind,” Heron says, finding his voice again finally. “Half,” Erik says, motioning to the swollen eye. “This one should heal, I think. But with no depth perception and a narrower field of vision—” “No,” Heron says. “I mean you’re blind—you aren’t dead. You want to help, you want to save your people, then do it. You don’t have to lead an army to do that.”

“You said they were a…religious…?” “Oligarchy,” he finishes. “Ruled by five high priests, who are in turn elected by smaller delegations of regular priests, one for each sub-country. Though the common belief is that each high priest is chosen by God himself.” “God?” Artemisia asks. “They’re monotheistic, yes,” he says. She rolls her eyes. “Just say there’s only one. You aren’t in court, your fancy words don’t impress anyone.”

“Spiros and the other guards move in front of us, clearing a path to the gangway—a thick wooden plank leading from our ship to theirs. The sight of it makes my stomach clench and I imagine all the ways I could topple off it. Spiros crosses first, the plank rattling beneath his feet with each step he takes, though he hardly seems to notice it. He’s done this before, of course. So has Søren—I’m the only one new at this. “If it helps,” Søren murmurs to me, “I’ve never seen anyone fall off a gangway unless someone pushed them.” “Thank you,” I reply dryly, before taking my first step onto the rickety plank.”

“He looks at Erik. “The last thing you’re going to do is wallow. You’re going to get back on your feet and figure out how to adjust. Trust me, you’ll thank me for it later.” Erik grimaces but nods. “I’m sure I will,” he says, forcing himself to sit up, and groaning as he does. “But right now, I’d like to say some far less savory things to you.” “Keep a list,” Heron says with a small smile. “You can tell them to me over dinner.” For an instant, Erik is shocked and flustered—a look I’ve never seen on him before. He recovers his wits quickly enough. “It’s a deal,” he says. Artemisia looks between the two of them, eyebrows raised so high they almost disappear entirely into her hair. “We are at war,” she says with a sigh. “Surely there is a better time to flirt than when death is around every corner?” “Truth be told, I’m hard-pressed to think of a better time to flirt,” Erik says, pushing himself to his feet. “You very well may never get another chance.” Artemisia rolls her eyes. “Just because I can’t see you doesn’t mean I don’t know you’re rolling your eyes, Art,” he says, holding an arm out to her, which she takes. She guides him a couple of hesitant steps. “Just because you don’t know how to flirt—” “I know how,” she snaps indignantly as she leads him out of the tent, the two of them continuing to bicker as they go.”