“a single outburst does not produce a difficult relational environment. It is only when a parent [or anyone] repeatedly and regularly uses anger to close conversations, in the broadest sense of 'conversation,' that a dilemma is framed. When a parent [or partner] uses anger or the threat of anger to dominate the emotional atmosphere, then even potentially good conversations with them lose spontaneity, openness and honesty.” RelationshipsAbuseAngerParentsDominationEmotional AbuseAttackSpouses Book:Difficult Mothers: Understanding and Overcoming Their Power Source: Difficult Mothers: Understanding and Overcoming Their Power
“... you may seek out a partner who psychologically resembles your mother and found that you have walked right back into a difficult relationship. Perhapse you chose to be close to someone who turns out to be as volatile as your mother and who inflicts discomfort all too familiar to you. Or perhaps gradually, over time, your partner or close friend becomes like your mother; that may be because you unconsciously behave in ways that encourage others to treat you as your mother did.” MotherAbuseParentsAbusive RelationshipsAbuse Recovery Book:Difficult Mothers: Understanding and Overcoming Their Power Source: Difficult Mothers: Understanding and Overcoming Their Power
“One of the main tasks of adolescence is to achieve an identity—not necessarily a knowledge of who we are, but a clarification of the range of what we might become, a set of self-references by which we can make sense of our responses, and justify our decisions and goals.” LifeValuesIdentityGoalsDecisionsAdolescenceRespponsibilities Book:Altered Loves Source: Altered Loves