“The American dream? We don't have a dream in Britain because we're bloody awake!” WorldDreamAmericaModernAwakeBritainAmerican DreamBloodyModern World Author:Al Murray
“Our cheeky sidekick. We're like a motorcycle and sidecar.” WorldAmericaModernModern WorldMotorcycleSidekicksCheeky Author:Al Murray
“Prince Charles is the only member of the Royal Family who ever left Cinderella for the Ugly Duckling.” WorldAmericaLeftModernMembersUglyRoyalModern WorldRoyal FamilyDucklingsUgly Duckling Author:Des Hanafin
“I said it three times actually.” WorldSaidAmericaThreeModernThree TimesModern World Author:Edward Heath
“William Hague, the world's favourite hairline.” WorldAmericaModernFavouriteModern World Author:Rory Bremner
“They're called Virgin Trains because they don't go all the way.” WorldWayAmericaModernTrainVirginsModern World Author:Simon Hoggart
“I was out there for 12 days. There are more beggars in Soho than there are in Kabul.” WorldAmericaModernModern WorldBeggarKabulSoho Author:Neil Morrissey
“You have city centre pubs where men go to meet girls, not realising that all girls in city centre pubs have thighs like tug boats and morals that would surprise a zoo animal.” MenWorldAmericaGirlAnimalCitiesMoralModernSurpriseBoatRealisingCentreModern WorldThighsZoosPubs Author:Jeremy Clarkson
“The fact is that Britain is the most warlike nation on earth. In the history of armed combat, we are the only democracy to have declared war on another democracy - England versus Finland in the second world war, in case you're interested - and we're always at the front of the queue when Johnny Foreigner gets a bit uppity. Who stood up to the Kaiser? Who stood up to Adolf? And let's not forget the Argies. What other country would have sent its fleet halfway round the world and lost 250 men to protect a flock of sheep and some oil that might or might not be there? We're still at it.” MenWorldStillsWarCountryFactsMightEarthAmericaLostNationsBitsForgetCasesDemocracyModernFrontsProtectEnglandRoundsOilWar Of The WorldsBritainCombatSheepWorld War IOther CountriesVersusModern WorldHalfwayForeignersFlocksSecond World WarStood UpQueuesFinland Author:Jeremy Clarkson