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Quote by Emo Philips

“You know, a lot of girls go out with me just to further their careers...damn anthropologists.”

Quote by Emo Philips

Author

Emo Philips, born on February 7, 1956, is a versatile entertainer known for his contributions to music, performance, and comedy. His unique style and humor have won him the affection of a wide audience. more

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“The other day a woman came up to me and said, Didn't I see you on television? I said, I don't know. You can't see out the other way.”

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“My grandmother's brain was dead, but her heart was still beating. It was the first time we ever had a democrat in the family.”

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“The IRS sent back my tax return saying I owed $800. I said If you'll notice, I sent a paper clip with my return. Given what you've been paying for things lately, that should more than make up the difference.”

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“A friend of mine gave me a Philip Glass record. I listened to it for five hours before I realized it had a scratch on it.”

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“Back in high school, my buddies tried to put the make on anything that moved. I told them, Why limit yourselves?”

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“My ex-girlfriend was very sexy. She reminded me of the Sphinx because she was very mysterious and eternal and solid...and her nose was shot off by French soldiers.”

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“If Bob Barr (conservative republican congressman from Georgia) caught on fire and I was holding a bucket of water, it would be great act of discipline to pour it on him. I would do it, but I'd hate myself in the morning.”

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“I was having an out-of-body experience, it was so hot. I felt I was watching someone play in a blue dress, and it wasn't me.”

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“Be quick but do not hurry.”

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“Every leader needs to clearly explain the top three things the organization is working on. If you can't, you are not leading well.”

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