“Many presidents have believed in God, but Donald Trump evidently believes that he is God.” Quote by Michael R. Burch
“Donald Trump really is a fan of the Bible, except that it's far too long for him to read. So he just released a new, improved version, the Gospel According to Trump. It reads: "I, Donald Trump, am God. Praise, worship, and adore Me as I do Myself. Then all shall be Great, as I am Great. The End."” LongEndsFansTrumpWorshipPraiseVersionsAdore Author:Michael R. Burch
“Trump claims he'd be the "best jobs president that God ever created." But isn't his claim to fame firing people?” PeopleJobsPresidentTrumpFameClaimsBeing The BestBest JobFiring Author:Michael R. Burch
“The slogan of the American Civil Rights Movement was "We shall overcome!" Donald Trump's new campaign slogan is "We shall overcomb!"” RightsMovementTrumpOvercomingCampaignsCivil RightsSlogansCivil Rights Movement Author:Michael R. Burch
“Rand Paul tried hard to upstage Donald Trump at the first debate, talking tough about his guns and his right not to register them. But with his pixie-ish perm, Paul does not impress me as the gunslinger type. Rand Paul is the RuPaul of politics. He would do better to defend his right to carry an unregistered blow-dryer and curling irons.” FirstsDoeHardTalkingTypeTrumpGunToughBlowDebateIronImpressRegisterGunslingerPixiesDryersPerms Author:Michael R. Burch
“Donald Trump's hairpiece has reportedly narrowed its list of running partners down to Don King, Kramer, William Shatner, Dolly Parton and Phil Spector, and has no worries about being upstaged.” RunningWorryTrumpKingsListsPartnersNo WorriesKramer Author:Michael R. Burch
“After Donald Trump's derogatory comments about immigrants, NBC has officially cancelled Celebrity Apprentice. Think about it: Donald Trump isn't even president yet, and he's already made America a better place!” ThinkingMadeAmericaPresidentTrumpImmigrantsCommentBetter PlaceApprenticeNbcDerogatory Author:Conan O'Brien
“Donald Trump isn't really running for president, come on! This is obviously a new reality show, Celebrity Presidential Apprentice. It ends with the incompetent celebrity being berated, humiliated, then unceremoniously fired.” EndsShowsRealityRunningPresidentTrumpPresidentialIncompetentHumiliatedApprenticeReality Shows Author:Michael R. Burch
“Trump has officially changed his name to Ronald because he's such a clown, and in sympathy his toupée is changing its name to Bozo.” NamesChangedTrumpClown Author:Michael R. Burch
“Donald Trump said he will not decide about a possible run for the presidency until after the current season of Celebrity Apprentice wraps up. Say what you want about Trump, at least this guy has his priorities in order. He doesn't want to let actual reality get in the way of his reality show.” WayWantSaidShowsRealityRunningGuyOrderTrumpSeasonsCurrentsWhat You WantPrioritiesPresidencyThis GuyWrapsApprenticeReality Shows Author:Jay Leno
“Even Donald Trump's hairpiece is fed up with his insults and says it now supports Bernie Sanders. When Trump found out, he sobbed” FoundSupportTrumpInsultFedsFed Up Author:Michael R. Burch