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Quote by Paul Merson

“Glenn could see I was bricking it and turned round to me as I sat there, gripping the armrests. "You all right?" he said. "I hate flying, Boss. I'm shitting myself." "Don't worry, Merse. It's going to be OK. We *won't* crash." I thought, "Thank God for that. Glenn's said we're going to be safe. Nothing's going to fuck with us now.”

Book:How Not to Be a Professional Footballer

Work

How Not to Be a Professional Footballer

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Author

Paul Merson

Paul Merson, born on March 20, 1968, is a former English professional footballer known for his offensive skills and match intelligence on the field. more

“I crawled back to bed, knowing I was done for. Hours later, the phone in our room started ringing. It was George. He was not happy. "Room 312. Now!" he shouted. Bouldy got up. I tried to pull myself together, splashing my face with water and hauling on my shorts and flip flops. It was a lovely day outside, the sun was scorching hot and there wasn't a cloud in the sky, but it might as well have been a pissing wet morning in St Albans for all I cared. I felt sick to the pit of my stomach as we made the Walk of Death to Room 312, which I knew was Paul and Gus's room. When we walked in, I thought I'd arrived in downtown Baghdad. Water dripped from the ceiling. The board games were in pieces and all the plastic parts were scattered over the floor. The balcony window was wide open and I could see a bed upended by the pool outside.”

Trouble Football Humour Prank

Book:How Not to Be a Professional Footballer

Source: How Not to Be a Professional Footballer

“One soldier picked up a dead Argentine, supported the corpse's weight underneath his arm, put a cigarette in the dead man's mouth, then one in his own. He then held a lighter under the corpse's cigarette and his friend took a photograph. They both laughed. I also laughed. This was foolish ― smoking can kill.”

Humour Army Soldiers Falklands

Book:A Soldiers Song: True Stories From The Falklands

Source: A Soldiers Song: True Stories From The Falklands

“Well, some men learn by listening, some read, some observe and analyze — and some of us just have to pee on the electric fence.”

Humour

Book:Variable Star

Source: Variable Star