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Compleat Gentleman: The Modern Man's Guide to Chivalry

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Brad Miner

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“The video was called The Clear Path and it followed the course of a life 40 years ago and the course of a life today. In the path 40 years ago the path was clear and obvious. The illustrated protagonists of the video did not need to spend time thinking about his sexuality or his gender or his religion. That same protagonist living life today was given options. What is your sexuality? What is your gender? How do you want to find connection and community? The point the video was making now was that there is no longer a clear path and that was more work. And at that point it was kind of pissing me off. I felt like it was making it seem like allowing for different kinds of people was a burden, but then the video turned it around. Over illustrated images of happy families of all sorts the narrator said 'The reality is the benefits of this far out weigh the costs. If we do not let people know that it is possible to be different the ones who are different will live their entire lives in a kind of cultural prison. And there are so many ways to be different that almost everyone ends up feeling imprisoned by some aspect of a society that only allows for the default path. The problem is that as progressives we pretend that there are no costs and that no one is losing anything. The video continued, but of course some people do lose, especially those whos power was tied up not in their wealth, but in fitting comfortably into the clear path. Now these people have only lost what they should lose, but that is also true of other forms of concentrated power. We are in a system that tells, for example, the wealthy, that they deserve all of their wealth and it should be protected through force. So, naturally the newly alienated feel singled out and victimized. The solution isn't going back to the one clear path. The solution is everywhere and always the decentralization and redistribution of all forms of power.”

PowerSocietyHegemonyIdentity Politics
Book:A Beautifully Foolish Endeavor
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“The many delights of solo living are seldom shown in the media, just as the pain, vulnerability, and often conflict of living alongside the same person for years and years are rarely depicted, unless a "break-up" is involved. What is the impact of seeing the repetition, over and over and over again, of the "happily-ever-after" of getting together with a partner as the ending of every story from fairy tale to action movie? How much do we internalize the notion that this is the goal we should be thriving for?”

RelationshipsSocietyBinary
Book:Life Isn't Binary: On Being Both, Beyond, and In-Between
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