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Quote by Sam Clemens

“Of all God's creatures there is only one that cannot be made the slave of the lash. That one is the cat. - Notebook, 1894”

Quote by Sam Clemens

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Sam Clemens

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“We wished to go to the Ambrosian Library, and we did that also. We saw a manuscript of Virgil, with annotations in the handwriting of Petrarch, the gentleman who loved another man's Laura, and lavished upon her all through life a love which was a clear waste of the raw material. It was sound sentiment, but bad judgment. It brought both parties fame, and created a fountain of commiseration for them in sentimental breasts that is running yet. But who says a word in behalf of poor Mr. Laura? (I do not know his other name.) Who glorifies him? Who bedews him with tears? Who writes poetry about him? Nobody. How do you suppose he liked the state of things that has given the world so much pleasure? How did he enjoy having another man following his wife every where and making her name a familiar word in every garlic-exterminating mouth in Italy with his sonnets to her pre-empted eyebrows? They got fame and sympathy--he got neither. This is a peculiarly felicitous instance of what is called poetical justice. It is all very fine; but it does not chime with my notions of right. It is too one-sided--too ungenerous.”

HumorTwainVirgilInnocents AbroadTwainisms
Book:The Innocents Abroad, Or, the New Pilgrims' Progress
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“A thousand curses on you and those who spawned you! You've plagued me long enough, you stygian fiend! I don't know what sulfurous pit you've crawled out of, but I mean to return you to it! I'll send you on a voyage down the river Styx if it's the last thing I do!" Twain directed his attention back to the phone. "No, I wasn't talking to you, but most of what I said still applies.”

HumorLawyerTwain
Book:William Bradshaw and Fool's Gold
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“Nichts lieben die Deutschen so von ganzem Herzen wie die Oper. Sie werden durch Gewohnheit und Erziehung dahin geleitet. Auch wir Amerikaner können es ohne Zweifel eines Tages noch zu solcher Liebe bringen. Bis jetzt findet aber vielleicht unter fünfzig Besuchern der Oper einer wirklich Gefallen daran; von den übrigen neunundvierzig gehen viele, glaube ich, hin, weil sie sich daran gewöhnen möchten, und die andern, um mit Sachkenntnis davon reden zu können. Letztere summen gewöhnlich die Melodien vor sich hin, während sie auf der Bühne gesungen werden, um ihren Nachbarn zu zeigen, daß sie nicht zum erstenmal in der Oper sind. Sie verdienten dafür gehängt zu werden.”

OperaMark TwainTwainOper
Book:Meistererzählungen
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