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Michael J Heil

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“I came back for you that night.' ... He had come back. 'Just like I told you I would. I came back for you, and you weren't there,' he continued. 'You promised me, Princess.' A smidgen of guilt formed within me, and I wasn't sure if it was for lying to him, or the throwing the dagger at his face part. Probably both. 'I... I couldn't.' 'Couldn't?' His voice had dropped again, becoming lower, thicker. 'I have a feeling that if there's something you want badly enough, nothing will stop you.' A harsh, bitter-sounding laugh escaped me. 'You know nothing.”

“So many memories come to mind—the child you were, the adult you’ve become—so much anguish for what happened all those years ago. You never wanted to let anyone down, I know. You feel everything so intensely. Just don’t tell me that you don’t deserve better. You do. Don’t tell me you’re a failure. You’re not. We learn from every mistake. That’s not failing; it’s growing. You are a beautiful, empathetic being of love and light. And don’t say hope will damn you. It won’t always, I promise.”

“I am a troubled and vexed human being drowning in the fear born of the insurmountable wounds left by a journey from which recovery is unlikely. And although my limp dramatically diminishes my gait and my trauma screams the insanity of entertaining any notion of limping forward, I simply cannot surrender to wounds, or limp, or trauma. For it is the troubled and vexed person who understands better than any other that while recovery might be unlikely, victory is not.”