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Quote by Christopher Dines

“Most people are trying to change the outcomes in their lives, rather than changing themselves as a person. They want to have meaningful, loving and trustworthy relationships, generate more capital, get physically fit or set up a business, without truly putting in the effort to rewire their brains and change their subconscious programming. This is putting the cart before the horse.”

Quote by Christopher Dines

Book:Super Self Care: How to Find Lasting Freedom from Addiction, Toxic Relationships and Dysfunctional Lifestyles
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Super Self Care: How to Find Lasting Freedom from Addiction, Toxic Relationships and Dysfunctional Lifestyles

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Christopher Dines

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Book:Super Self Care: How to Find Lasting Freedom from Addiction, Toxic Relationships and Dysfunctional Lifestyles
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“The walls still hold your voice, thin as dust, settled into the cracks, soft enough that if I press my ear close, I swear I hear you breathing. The air is thick with almost-words, syllables that never found a home, sentences that collapsed before they reached my mouth.”

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“Long-term, loving, erotic relationships take a lot of work, willingness, patience, compromise, deep listening and humility. Many people struggle in long-term erotic relationships, especially after the fleeting ‘falling in love’ phase has passed. Very often during the first year in a romantic relationship, euphoric and intense emotions, together with high levels of lust, sweep both parties involved off their feet. Excitement, a boost in confidence, and a carefree mood are felt by the couple. This is often described as ‘falling in love’. The couple will very often disclose sensitive secrets about themselves, yearning to feel closer to each other. They are high on life and engaged in intense, sexual romance. This can last up to 18 months depending on the couple, but more than likely it will fizzle out after just one year. All too often after 18 months, when hormone levels and feelings of lust having reverted back to normal levels, couples come crashing back down to reality. This can be very disheartening for both parties.”

RelationshipsMindfulnessShameAddictionRecoverySelf CareCodependencyChristopher DinesSuper Self Care
Book:Super Self Care: How to Find Lasting Freedom from Addiction, Toxic Relationships and Dysfunctional Lifestyles
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“The problem is that many of us rely on our everyday, repetitive, mundane thought-life (which is mostly memory), and neglect to monitor our emotions and feelings. This is what keeps us feeling trapped, and therefore stops us from behaving differently towards making positive changes in our lives. We consciously say we want to do something, but feel at odds with what we have declared we wish to do. We think we want to change, but we feel otherwise. How baffling! The deep feelings we have, which we can detect by mindfully paying attention to our body, is what we call our subconscious programming. Such subjective programming is what determines how we behave most of time.”

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Book:Super Self Care: How to Find Lasting Freedom from Addiction, Toxic Relationships and Dysfunctional Lifestyles
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“The difficulty in overcoming self-abandonment is that it is very often unconscious behaviour. Some of us are so deeply ingrained in our survival traits, and swamped in self-delusion, that we cannot see when we are neglecting ourselves. It is extremely difficult to heal from self-abandoning behaviour without help. We need non-shaming people to mirror back to us our disempowering behaviour.”

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Book:Super Self Care: How to Find Lasting Freedom from Addiction, Toxic Relationships and Dysfunctional Lifestyles
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“A deeper, mature love with your spouse/partner is much more fulfilling and richer than the act of ‘falling in love’. A mature love requires trust, honesty and friendship. This cannot be experienced months into a romantic relationship. Mature love is a process which usually begins to develop after 18 months. It is a practice which can be applied one day at a time. When we are in a deeper, mature love, we can share our joys and sadness with our spouse/partner. We can share our desires and build on those dreams. We can support each other when we are grieving or coming to terms with a loss. We can share intellectual curiosity and laugher and have a strong, healthy attachment figure in our lives.”

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Book:Super Self Care: How to Find Lasting Freedom from Addiction, Toxic Relationships and Dysfunctional Lifestyles
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“It is our unconscious thoughts, emotions, sensations, feelings and beliefs which will paint our reality. The difficulty for many of us is attempting to build a new fulfilling reality if we have experienced something different. When something goes ‘wrong’ while we are untangling from a co-dependent relationship or creating a new goal, our automatic reaction is to immediately revert back to old thinking and habits.”

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Book:Super Self Care: How to Find Lasting Freedom from Addiction, Toxic Relationships and Dysfunctional Lifestyles
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“No one can be YOU. Never accept the stories that observers speak about you, good or bad. If you accept the bad, you feel worthless. If you accept the good, you hold onto the past, which is a past that does not consider your wealth of knowledge and beauty. Only you can write your story.”

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“The knowledge of the Spirit is the true secret of creativity, leadership and happiness. It is spiritual intelligence that makes an ordinary person a genius. When a genius loses his spiritual intelligence, he becomes quite ordinary.”

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Book:Practising Spiritual Intelligence: For Innovation, Leadership and Happiness
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