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Quote by Joyce Carol Oates

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Joyce Carol Oates
Joyce Carol Oates

Joyce Carol Oates is a renowned American author born on June 16, 1938. Her works span various literary forms such as novels, poetry, and drama, known for her unique narrative techniques and profound thematic explorations. more

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“Odavno znam da nema pogrešnih osećanja, ali sad znam da je bol jedini stvaran i da je bol, jebiga – da je bol prag koji treba da se pređe, da bi se sišlo u suštinu, u srž života, pa i dublje od toga. Nismo predodređeni ni za šta drugo, ali najveći broj ljudi ne ide dalje. Poseku se i na posekotinu nalepe flaster. Neće u ranu nabiti čiodu i kopati po njoj, nego će popiti Panadol, Brufen, Aspirin. Što dalje od shvatanja da je posle bola skoro beskorisno doživeti bilo šta drugo...!”

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“„Vidiš, prihvatiš li bol – uživala u njemu ili ne – podstičeš kontrolu nad telom. Budi se potreba da bolom, pa i samom sobom, u svakom smislu ovladaš.” „Mišel Fuko bi to verovatno nazvao vidom samodiscipline”, rekao sam, „jer je pokoreni u isto vreme i onaj koji disciplinuje i onaj koji se disciplinuje – pa i posredno, putem pristanka da bude disciplinovan.” „Zar nije zanimljivo to što nam, za ma kakav značajan preobražaj, treba nekakav pokretač?”, rekla je Valerija. „Pokretanje nekog procesa je neminovno za promenu... Međutim, to i nema nekog smisla kad se shvati da je čitav život neprekidan proces promene.” „Da, ali čovek to i ne doživljava baš tako”, rekla je Irina. „Zato mu je potrebna zamisao o tom – pokretaču.”

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“As soon as somebody starts talking about times when they felt excluded, betrayed, or wronged, stop and listen. When somebody is talking to you about pain in their life, even in those cases when you may think their pain is performative or exaggerated, it’s best not to try to yank the conversations back to your frame. Your first job is to stay within the other person’s standpoint to more fully understand how the world looks to them. Your next job is to encourage them to go into more depth about what they have just said. “I want to understand your point of view as much as possible. What am I missing here?” Curiosity is the ability to explore something even in stressful and difficult circumstances. Remember that the person who is lower in any power structure than you are has a greater awareness of the situation than you do. A servant knows more about his master than the master knows about the servant. Someone who is being sat on knows a lot about the sitter—the way he shifts his weight and moves—whereas the sitter may not be aware that the sat-on person is even there.”

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Book:How to Know a Person: The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen
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