“...an ambitious array of dishonorable intentions that he intended to wield upon the Countess’s nether regions. — BATS 2015” Quote by Fred Barnett
“They’re dogs. Never trust a man. Even when he’s dead. Especially when he’s dead. — Bats 2015” VampiresBats Author:Fred Barnett
“You’re going to show up to a duel, in the street, wearing Come F—k Me Heels?" — Bats 2015” VampiresBats Author:Fred Barnett
“Depart, Satan,' she said, with a complete lack of enthusiasm. — Bats 2015” VampiresBats Author:Fred Barnett
“Wichtor’s been cranky ever since a fat vulture roosted on his granite Cârnat, uh, schmekel in 1864 and broke it off." — Bats 2015” VampiresBats Author:Fred Barnett
“Vlad was sexting Elizabeth a picture of his pulă rigiditate, while he told Mina. “I vould like totally hang up on the dude. He’s no Baldwin." — Bats 2015” VampiresBats Author:Fred Barnett
“We won’t be able to sleep without the sound of her self-loathing orgasms crying out into the night." —Bats 2015” VampiresBats Author:Fred Barnett
“I was afraid that your buns were blown all the way to the Bardot Museum in Paris, where they put them on display, and then….” Mina said, “Were they displayed like this?" —Bats 2015” VampiresBats Author:Fred Barnett
“Grrrrowpt.” said dead Penelope. Dead Huthbert nodded, and hugged her. She moved his dusty hand from her dusty ass." — BATS 2015” VampiresBats Author:Fred Barnett
“Do it for the kids! The ones who look up to you — especially when they are pleading for their lives." — Bats 2015” VampiresBats Author:Fred Barnett
“Gentle With Them Thar Spurs'—a sequel to 'Riders of the Purple Sau-Sage.' Spurs was the feminist novel of its day…which was Tuesday." —Bats 2015” WesternVampiresBats Author:Fred Barnett