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We Have Shadows Too

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Nicole T. Smith

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“So, are you going to tell her?” Mark asked. He was, and still is, a persistent person. Good question, I thought as I stared blankly into space. Am I going to march up to Martina Elizabeth and tell her that I love her? I pondered the question carefully as though it was part of some unscheduled final exam. Instead of answers, however, all I could come up with was a series of dilemmas. I noticed that Mark was still staring at me with a quizzical look on his face. “What?” I yelped. “You haven’t answered my question, man,” I looked down, inhaled deeply, looked up and exhaled very slowly. “I, uh, don’t know.” I turned my gaze to my lunch tray, the other tables, and the clock on the wall. Anything to avoid my best friend’s inquisitive gaze. “I’ll take that as a resounding ‘no,’” Mark said. “I didn’t say that.” “No,” Mark said, “but it’s what you meant to say.” “I – I can’t tell her. Not now.” “Why the fuck not?” Mark asked, his voice rising in pitch and volume. A group of student journalists from The Serpent’s Tale – Alan Goode, Francisco Vargas, Juan Calderon and Roger Lawrence – looked at us with bemused expressions from one of the neighboring tables. Mark noticed, cleared his throat and lowered his voice to a half-whisper. “Why don’t you tell her, you dumbass?” “I can’t,” I repeated, shaking my head emphatically. “What are you so afraid of?” Another good question. “Nothing…everything,” I replied. “What, pray tell, do you mean?” Mark asked. “Are you more afraid that she doesn’t like you, or that she does?”

InsecurityBest FriendsTeenage LoveTeen LoveHigh School Angst
Book:Reunion: A Story: A Novella
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“Do you remember what you said to me on the last day of school?” I ask. “I said a lot of things, Jim. But that was, what? 14? 15 years ago?” “You said that if I didn’t tell her how I felt, it would come back someday and bite me on my ass.” “That sounds like something I would say.” “I hate to admit it,” I say, “but you were right.” “I was wise beyond my years,” Mark says lightly. “At the time, I thought you were just messing with my head.” “I was messing with your head. I was also telling you the truth.”

Lost LoveBest FriendsRegretsHigh School Memories
Book:Reunion: A Story: A Novella
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