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And That’s Why I’m Single

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Josh Stern

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“Open the bag, open the bag, open the bag!” he says, bounding through the thigh-deep water. She does. He dumps the second fish inside, and she zips it closed. “I didn’t know you could do that!” Hallelujah calls out as Jonah splashes away from her again. “Neither did I!” He lunges sideways with a loud whoop, misses his footing, and sits down in the water. He’s up again in a second, shaking himself off like a dog. “But I’m not going to stop until the fish get smart enough to figure out what I’m doing and—” Lunge. Splash. Up. Shake. “—run away!” “Run?” “Whatever!”