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Cis White Gay: The Making of a Gender Heretic

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Ben Appel

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“To be queer, then, is to marginalize oneself, to rebel against the existing order, even if that order benefits the many over the few. To be queer is to revel in victimhood. It is to reject Western epistemology. It is to act on one's base instincts and desires. It is to fail, even when success is within reach, if only to prove that failure is inevitable in the current system for anyone who is not cisheteronormative and white.”

GenderLgbtqQueerGender IdentityGender IdeologyMarginalizationLgbtq LiteratureQueer TheoryGender StudiesGay Authors
Book:Cis White Gay: The Making of a Gender Heretic
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“That's because true travel, the kind with no predetermined end, is one of the most selfish endeavors we can possibly undertake-an act in which we focus solely on our own fulfillment, with little regard to those we leave behind. After all, we're the ones venturing out into the big crazy world, filling up journals, growing like weeds. And we have the gall to think they're just sitting at home, soaking in security and stability. It is only when we reopen these wrapped and ribboned boxes, upon our triumphant return home, that we discover nothing is the way we had left it before.”

TravelIndependentChinaRussiaCubaIndependent Woman
Book:Around the Bloc: My Life in Moscow, Beijing, and Havana
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“My mother's dearest wish was for me to have the sort of education usually reserved for a son." "Why is that?" She shrugged. "She disliked having been so sheltered at her convent school. The nuns wanted to mold young ladies who were virtuous, not learned, and when France went mad, she resented having been molded into a beautiful, helpless damsel, unprepared to fend for herself in any particular. "She convinced my father that that must never be allowed to happen to me. That I must be molded with great independence, and raised to be able to care for myself. She wanted to make sure that if the world ever went to hell in a handbasket again in my day, as in hers, that I would be able to survive.”

ScholarMothers LoveWell EducatedKate MadsenIndependent Woman
Book:My Dangerous Duke
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“Mama Odie had been willing to help both Tiana and Naveen the year before. Hopefully, she would be willing to do so again. Please. Please. Please. The strangeness of having to rely on someone else for help struck Tiana anew. She knew she was independent to a fault. She had lost count of how many times she had wasted hours---sometimes even days---toiling away at some task or another, refusing to ask for help.”

TianaIndependent WomanRelying On Others
Book:Almost There
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“Mamá. I have spent my entire life doing what is right. I went to church every Sunday, I worked in the fields, I got straight A's in school, I went to college and commuted home to save on bills and preserve my reputation, and I even raised enough money to buy the farm so I could take care of the family. But now, I want some freedom because I've earned it. I don't want to be courted and married to some man I don't even know if I'm compatible with. I don't even know if I want to get married. Ever. It's fine if Blanca feels comfortable preserving this tradition--- but I don't. Not even if it makes you happy." Mamá's eyes bugged, and she yelled at her eldest daughter. "You will not disrespect me in my house!" Carolina laughed. "Well, it's my house, actually. But that's fine. I don't need it." Blanca's jaw dropped. "Cari! Stop." "No. I should've done this years ago." Carolina turned and walked toward the living room. "Carolina! Get back here at once!" her mom called out, but she didn't respond. Enrique was sitting at the dining room table, wringing his hands, his forehead wrinkled, his fists clenched. Her father had him cornered. "So, Enrique, do you see yourself married in the next year?" Being interrogated by Papá was something Carolina wouldn't wish on her worst enemy. "Enrique, let's go." Enrique's brows raised as he stood. "Where?" Carolina looked at her father, then back to Enrique, then back to her father. She had created this fake relationship as a ruse to keep her family happy. What she was about to do would instead possibly tear them apart--- but it had to be done. Enrique had made her want things she hadn't really wanted with another man before. There was no going back. The time was now. "Out on a real date.”

Standing Up For YourselfIndependent WomanParent Issues
Book:Kiss Me, Mi Amor
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