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Quote by Nitya Prakash

“Bare minimum feels like royal treatment when you have a history of being undervalued.”

Quote by Nitya Prakash

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“Hey, better than the real thing,” I said. “What do you even do with a chimera?” “What wouldn’t you do with a chimera?” Jeff asked. “They’re like the Swiss Army knife of animals.” “Party in the front, business in the back,” Catcher agreed. That earned a snort and laugh from me. “Any animal that can be compared to a mullet is a good animal in my book.”

Merit Jeff Ombuddies

Book:Biting Bad

Source: Biting Bad

“Achmed 'Two Jews walk into a bar' No no no no no' Jeff You don't let Jews in your bar? You racist bastard' Achmed" -Achmed the dead terrorist and Jeff”

Jeff Achmed Dunham

Author:Jeff Dunham

“Go to sleep!”

The Killer Jeff Creepypasta

Author:Jeff the Killer

“Be silent and safe — silence never betrays you; Be true to your word and your work and your friend; Put least trust in him who is foremost to praise you, Nor judge of a road till it draw to the end.”

Inspirational Motivational Poetry Work Silence Advice Trust Friends Praise Safety Judgement True

Book:Life of John Boyle O'Reilly

Source: Life of John Boyle O'Reilly

“Soiled, forgotten coats of arms were carved above their massive doorways, and these unsettled Ted: such universal, defining symbols made meaningless by nothing more than time.”

Book:A Visit From the Goon Squad

Source: A Visit From the Goon Squad

“You gotta be kidding me!" I clench my fists. "I am NOT Bilfro Baggins. You are not a wizard with a pointy hat, and this is not the one ring of power." I raise my finger toward the jagged stone. Jeff's brows rise. "Bilbo? Bilbo Baggins?" "Whatever!”

Crux Jeff Bilbo Baggins Birdie

Book:Crux

Source: Crux

“Conner looking at the text he sent Jeff the night before: 8:42pm..Reed:Need you to go to Denver w me. 8:46pm..Jeff: in meeting. give me 1 hr. 8:53pm..Reed: no can do. want wife back. going now. think i cn talk her into it wth sperm. Hell.Please don't let him have called her. 8:53pm..Jeff: R U drinking? 8:55pm..Reed: have wht she wants. solllid plan. better than hers. 8:56pm..Jeff: leaving now. wait 4 me. 9:02pm..Reed: don't worry botu it. 9:02pm..Jeff: WAIT 4 ME. 9:04pm..Jeff: PICKUP YOU PHONE 9:57pm..Jeff: you should stop for drink @ that bar in terminal with the big olives b4 flight. 10:22pm..Reed: hey, UR at the bar. you look pissed.”

Humor Jeff Conner

Book:Waking Up Married

Source: Waking Up Married

“Jeff opened blue eyes, grinned at me. “If you’re feeling left out . . .” I almost threw out an instinctive no, but I decided to throw him a bone. “Oh, Jeff. It’d be too good—you and me. Too powerful, too much emotion, too much heat. We’d come together and boom”—I clapped my hands together—“like a moth to a flame, there’d be nothing left.” His eyes glazed over. “Combustion?” “Totally.” He was quiet for a moment, his index finger tracing a pattern on the knee of his jeans. Then he nodded. “Too powerful. It’d destroy us both.” I nodded solemnly. “Probably so.” But I leaned over, pressed my lips to his forehead. “We’ll always have Chicago.” “Chicago,” he dreamily repeated. “Yeah. Definitely.” He cleared his throat, seemed to regain a little composure. “When I tell this story later, you kissed me on the mouth. With tongue. And you were handsy.” I chuckled. “Fair enough.”

Book:Some Girls Bite

Source: Some Girls Bite

“Haven’t had breakfast,” Jeff replied too casually. “Well, that’s just awful,” I noted, making this news sound dire, my eyes going to his hands. “No wife to fill your belly before a hard day of the God’s honest work of tackling crime?” Max’s head came up and he made a strangled noise which I hoped was him choking back laughter because he thought I was cute. “Nope,” Jeff answered through his grin.”

Book:The Gamble

Source: The Gamble

“You look ho-ot. Sure you don’t wanna drop this vampire business and join the Pack? We’ve got better . . . insurance.”

Book:Some Girls Bite

Source: Some Girls Bite