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Quote by Michael Bihovsky

“Empathy is not the same as approval. And explaining something is not the same as excusing it. But if you want to change people, if you want to reduce terrible things like domestic violence, first you need to understand that such monsters do not usually come out of nowhere. They are usually created, in a stream of abuse that can go back for generations.”

Quote by Michael Bihovsky

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Michael Bihovsky

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“It’s easier, somehow, if there’s a reason for tragedy---lust or jealousy or hatred or revenge. We can find in these explanations an emotional tenor commensurate with the gravity of the act. There’s something we recognize as human, a motive toward which we can direct our rage but can also understand, at some primal level, as an extension of ourselves.”

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Book:The Empathy Exams
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“But please, please—won’t you—can’t you give me something that will cure Mother?” Up till then he had been looking at the Lion’s great feet and the huge claws on them; now, in his despair, he looked up at its face. What he saw surprised him as much as anything in his whole life. For the tawny face was bent down near his own and (wonder of wonders) great shining tears stood in the Lion’s eyes. They were such a big, bright tears compared with Digory’s own that for a moment he felt as if the Lion must really be sorrier about his Mother than he was himself.”

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“Frau Hermann! Fällt Ihnen denn gar nichts auf? Sie sind sehr intelligent. Sie scheinen auch über einen sehr hohen emotionalen Intelligenzquotienten zu verfügen, und Sie sind über die Maßen empathisch, haben ein ausgezeichnetes Gespür für die Stimmung anderer. Nur bei sich selbst versagen diese Fähigkeiten total. Was Ihre eigenen Gefühle angeht, laufen Sie mit einem dicken Brett vor dem Kopf herum. Das ist merkwürdig. Es stimmt ganz offensichtlich: Sie können alles andere, aber nicht sich selbst spüren!”

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Book:Mängelexemplar
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“When a story is unpleasant, it is hard to focus on details that allow you to put yourself in the place of the subject, because the pain of distortion starts to feel familiar. Paying attention often requires some sort of empathy for the subject, or at the very least, for the speaker. But empathy, these days, is hard to come by. Maybe this is because everyone is having such a hard time being understood themselves. Or because empathy requires us to dig way down into the murk, deeper than our own feelings go, to a place where the boundaries between our experience and everyone else's no longer exist.”

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Book:The Fire This Time: A New Generation Speaks About Race
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“...when you're reading article after article where the author is complaining about their kids, their spouses, their messy houses, and their demanding bosses, you start to see your own life through that lens. You get annoyed when your toddler spills their snack, instead of chuckling and realizing that's what toddlers do. You get mad when your spouse leaves their toothbrush out, instead of realizing that it was because they were in a rush to get to work after they fed the kids breakfast that morning. You start to think that if you had a nicer house, your life would be magically more organized. ...”

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Book:Parenting While Working from Home: A Monthly Guide to Help Parents Balance Their Careers, Connect with Their Kids, and Establish Their Inner Strength
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