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Therapy Quotes

“Even though we have been so influenced by the left hemisphere's ascendency, we also have an inherent capacity to be rooted in the relational right because we are, after all, first, last, and always beings whose embodied brains hunger for connection with others, literally shaping one another's ongoing experience in every moment.”

HealingTrustTherapyMental Health RecoveryRight HemisphereHealing Left DominanceHope In A Left Dominant World
Book:The Heart of Trauma: Healing the Embodied Brain in the Context of Relationships
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“If we trust that our inner world knows what is needed next, one outcome isn't preferable to another. It is so easy for us to want healing to pursue a more linear path: Something arises and it would be best if we could stay with that. There can be a sense of disappointment in therapist, patient, or both if the sensation doesn't return. This might be perceived as a lack in our patient's ability to maintain contact, a reflection of our inadequacy of a therapist, or simply discomfort that the therapy feels stuck.”

TrustListeningTherapyImperfectionTrauma HealingPerson CenteredAttunement
Book:The Heart of Trauma: Healing the Embodied Brain in the Context of Relationships
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“Trust of others is in short supply for many adult survivors, as complex trauma generally involves major relational betrayal. It is, therefore, expectable (although paradoxical) that clients with these histories are predisposed to be mistrustful at the outset of therapy, precisely because of (and in proportion to) the actual trustworthiness of the therapist. When past experiences have thought hard lessons, namely, that one can least afford to trust the people who should be most trustworthy, it stands to reason that confusion about trust results. The therapist must understand and not take offense either personally or professionally and not react judgmentally or defensively. Practically speaking, this involves the therapist being prepared to patiently and empathically respond to active or passive tests or challenges to trustworthiness as legitimate and meaningful communication that deserves a respectful reply in action as well as in words.”

TrustAbuseBetrayalTherapyChildhood AbuseComplex PtsdComplex TraumaDevelopmental TraumaInterpersonal Trauma
Book:Treatment of Complex Trauma: A Sequenced, Relationship-Based Approach
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“The overarching principle of a therapeutic relationship is that therapists should be ever mindful of a variant of the Hippocratic oath and, to the degree possible, strive to "do no more harm" (Courtois, 2010). Complex trauma clients have already experienced considerable harm, much of it at the hands of other human beings. As a result of the ubiquitous processes of transference, attachment styles, and IWM [Internal working models], these clients often view the therapist's behavior and their relationship through the lens of their trauma-related negative interpersonal expectancies and unhealed emotional wounds and injuries. Therapists should not be surprised to be "guilty until proven innocent", not because clients with complex trauma histories are "unfair" or "unreasonable" but precisely the opposite - because the most realistic self-protective stance for them (given the fact that betrayal and harm have been more the rule than the exception) is to "distrust first and verify" (or to be hypervigilant) rather than to start with an expectation of safety and trustworthiness.”

TrustSafetyTherapyChildhood AbuseComplex PtsdTherapistComplex Trauma
Book:Treatment of Complex Trauma: A Sequenced, Relationship-Based Approach
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“If the therapist understands and does not take mistrust as personal affront, the therapeutic relationship can evolve gradually. The client can begin to recognize that the therapist actually "gets" why he or she is initially skeptical, self-protective, or "realistically paranoid" and does not pressure the client to be a "happy camper" but instead works to earn trust by being honorable, reliable, and consistent. This also implies a view of the client's initial mistrust as expectable in light of the client's history - that is, as a strength rather than as a deficiency or pathology.”

TrustTherapyChildhood AbuseComplex TraumaDevelopmental TraumaInterpersonal Trauma
Book:Treatment of Complex Trauma: A Sequenced, Relationship-Based Approach
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“Forgiveness calls on deep reserves of moral courage: the courage to break out of the spiral of self-pity; the courage to set aside resentment; the courage to rise above biterness; the courage to act well, when all our instincts call on us to act badly. p112”

CourageLetting GoForgivenessTherapyBitternessResentmentCynicismForgiveSelf PityMoral Courage
Book:The Kindness Revolution: How we can restore hope, rebuild trust and inspire optimism
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“The power of music, narrative and drama is of the greatest practical and theoretical importance. One may see this even in the case of idiots, with IQs below 20 and the extremest motor incompetence and bewilderment. Their uncouth movements may disappear in a moment with music and dancing—suddenly, with music, they know how to move. We see how the retarded, unable to perform fairly simple tasks involving perhaps four or five movements or procedures in sequence, can do these perfectly if they work to music—the sequence of movements they cannot hold as schemes being perfectly holdable as music, i.e. embedded in music. The same may be seen, very dramatically, in patients with severe frontal lobe damage and apraxia—an inability to do things, to retain the simplest motor sequences and programmes, even to walk, despite perfectly preserved intelligence in all other ways. This procedural defect, or motor idiocy, as one might call it, which completely defeats any ordinary system of rehabilitative instruction, vanishes at once if music is the instructor. All this, no doubt, is the rationale, or one of the rationales, of work songs.”

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Book:The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat and Other Clinical Tales
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“And although I played along with him for a while so as not to prick his bubble, inside I felt pretty bleak indeed, because now I knew that he was going to be just as pliable and credulous as everyone else, he didn't appear to have anything close to the firepower I'd need to give me any hope of getting helped out of the trap of fraudulence and unhappiness I'd constructed for myself.”

DepressionTherapyOblivionDavid Foster Wallace
Book:Oblivion
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“The cases described in this section (The Fear of Being) may seem extreme, but I have become convinced that they are not as uncommon as one would think. Beneath the seemingly rational exterior of our lives is a fear of insanity. We dare not question the values by which we live or rebel against the roles we play for fear of putting our sanity into doubt. We are like the inmates of a mental institution who must accept its inhumanity and insensitivity as caring and knowledgeableness if they hope to be regarded as sane enough to leave. The question who is sane and who is crazy was the theme of the novel One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest. The question, what is sanity? was clearly asked in the play Equus. The idea that much of what we do is insane and that if we want to be sane, we must let ourselves go crazy has been strongly advanced by R.D. Laing. In the preface to the Pelican edition of his book The Divided Self, Laing writes: "In the context of our present pervasive madness that we call normality, sanity, freedom, all of our frames of reference are ambiguous and equivocal." And in the same preface: "Thus I would wish to emphasize that our 'normal' 'adjusted' state is too often the abdication of ecstasy, the betrayal of our true potentialities; that many of us are only too successful in acquiring a false self to adapt to false realities." Wilhelm Reich had a somewhat similar view of present-day human behavior. Thus Reich says, "Homo normalis blocks off entirely the perception of basic orgonotic functioning by means of rigid armoring; in the schizophrenic, on the other hand, the armoring practically breaks down and thus the biosystem is flooded with deep experiences from the biophysical core with which it cannot cope." The "deep experiences" to which Reich refers are the pleasurable streaming sensations associated with intense excitation that is mainly sexual in nature. The schizophrenic cannot cope with these sensations because his body is too contracted to tolerate the charge. Unable to "block" the excitation or reduce it as a neurotic can, and unable to "stand" the charge, the schizophrenic is literally "driven crazy." But the neurotic does not escape so easily either. He avoids insanity by blocking the excitation, that is, by reducing it to a point where there is no danger of explosion, or bursting. In effect the neurotic undergoes a psychological castration. However, the potential for explosive release is still present in his body, although it is rigidly guarded as if it were a bomb. The neurotic is on guard against himself, terrified to let go of his defenses and allow his feelings free expression. Having become, as Reich calls him, "homo normalis," having bartered his freedom and ecstasy for the security of being "well adjusted," he sees the alternative as "crazy." And in a sense he is right. Without going "crazy," without becoming "mad," so mad that he could kill, it is impossible to give up the defenses that protect him in the same way that a mental institution protects its inmates from self-destruction and the destruction of others.”

LifeFearEmotionLivingGuiltSexualityTherapyRepressionNeurosisBioenergetics
Book:Fear Of Life
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“For people who feel disrespected and unseen, politics is a seductive form of social therapy. Politics seems to offer a comprehensible moral landscape. We, the children of light, are facing off against them, the children of darkness. Politics seems to offer a sense of belonging. I am on the barricades with the other members of my tribe. Politics seems to offer an arena of moral action. To be moral in this world, you don’t have to feed the hungry or sit with the widow. You just have to be liberal or conservative, you just have to feel properly enraged at the people you find contemptible. Over the past decade, everything has become politicized. Churches, universities, sports, food selection, movie awards shows, late-night comedy— they have all turned into political arenas. Except this was not politics as it is normally understood. Healthy societies produce the politics of distribution. How should the resources of the society be allocated? Unhappy societies produce the politics of recognition. Political movements these days are fueled largely by resentment, by a person or a group’s feelings that society does not respect or recognize them. The goal of political and media personalities is to produce episodes in which their side is emotionally validated and the other side is emotionally shamed. The person practicing the politics of recognition is not trying to formulate domestic policies or to address this or that social ill; he is trying to affirm his identity, to gain status and visibility, to find a way to admire himself. But, of course, the politics of recognition doesn’t actually give you community and connection. People join partisan tribes, but they are not in fact meeting together, serving one another, befriending one another. Politics doesn’t make you a better person; it’s about outer agitation, not inner formation. Politics doesn’t humanize. If you attempt to assuage your sadness, loneliness, or anomie through politics, it will do nothing more than land you in a world marked by a sadistic striving for domination. You may try to escape a world of isolation and moral meaninglessness, only to find yourself in the pulverizing destructiveness of the culture wars.”

PoliticsEmotionMoralityTherapyBelongingResentmentPartisanshipPartisan PoliticsUs Vs Them
Book:How to Know a Person: The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen
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“All Hellenistic schools seem to define [wisdom] in approximately the same terms: first and foremost, as a state of perfect peace of mind. From this viewpoint, philosophy appears as a remedy for human worries, anguish, and misery brought about, for the Cynics, by social constraints and conventions; for the Epicureans, by the quest for false pleasures; for the Stoics, by the pursuit of pleasure and egoistic self-interest; and for the Skeptics, by false opinions. Whether or not they laid claim to the Socratic heritage, all Hellenistic philosophers agreed with Socrates that human beings are plunged in misery, anguish, and evil because they exist in ignorance. Evil is to be found not within things, but in the value judgments with people bring to bear upon things. People can therefore be cured of their ills only if they are persuaded to change their value judgments, and in this sense all these philosophies wanted to be therapeutic.”

PhilosophyTherapyCynicismSkepticismStoicismSocratesEpicureanism
Book:What Is Ancient Philosophy?
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“When the expected occurred, never panic, by keep calming, you gain control over the situation.”

InspirationalDeathQuotesHopeChallengesHealingSituationCourageDyingSelf HelpPositive ThinkingWise WordsDespairDepressionLife And LivingDeterminationStressAdversityCalmDisappointmentObstaclesPsychologicalUpliftingTherapyInner StrengthSelf MotivationNever Give UpFighting SpiritPositive OutlookHealthy LifestyleOvercomerOvercoming AdversityFearsEmotional PainHealthy HabitsStrength And CourageStrength Of WillAccidentDont WorryKeep CalmPersistent ActionsNegative Thought
Book:Pearls of Wisdom: Great mind
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“What do you think of when you think of mourning?' Jenny asks. The question snaps me back to attention. I answer without really thinking. "I guess 'Funeral Blues' by W.H. Auden. I think it was Auden. I suppose that's not very original.' 'I don't know it.' 'It's a poem.' 'I gathered.' 'I'm just clarifying. It's not a blues album.' Jenny ignores my swipe at her intelligence. 'Does your response need to be original? Isn't that what poetry is for, for the poet to express something so personal that it ultimately is universal?' I shrug. Who is Jenny, even new Jenny, to say what poetry is for? Who am I for that matter? 'Why do you thin of that poem in particular?' "Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone, / Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone, / Silence the pianos and with muffled drum / Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.' I learned the poem in college and it stuck.”

DeathPoetryDyingPoemTherapyMourningAudenWh Auden
Book:Lily and the Octopus
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“The moment you have to recruit people to put another person down, in order to convince someone of your value is the day you dishonor your children, your parents and your God. If someone doesn't see your worth the problem is them, not people outside your relationship.”

MenLoveEvilWomenSelf EsteemConfidenceSelf LoveShameRevengeSelf ConfidenceJealousyTherapyFakeComparisonWomen EmpowermentSelf CareShallowInsecureHatefulRuthlessShamefulHeartlessImmatureHatersRelationships 101ImmaturityCruelRise UpMean GirlsBulliesSpousesVengefulWivesHusbandsMature LoveSelf EvaluationLiving A LieEmpowering GirlsStalkersGodlessIn DenialMercilessStayingpositiveuniversity ComInsecurity IssuesDivorce 101Divorce CareOut Of TouchMentally BiasedDisallusionedDishonoring KidsDishonoring ParentsDishonoring YourselfVictomizer
Author:Shannon L. Alder
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“It is not the trauma itself that is the source of illness but the unconscious, repressed, hopeless despair over not being allowed to give expression to what one has suffered and the fact that one is not allowed to show and is unable to experience feelings of rage, anger, humiliation, despair, helplessness, and sadness. This causes many people to commit suicide because life no longer seems worth living if they are totally unable to live out all these strong feelings that are part of their true self.”

PsychologyLonelinessExpressionDespairSuicideTraumaTherapyTrueHelplessnessAuthentic Self
Book:For Your Own Good: Hidden Cruelty in Child-Rearing and the Roots of Violence
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“Non-professionals can also misrepresent the personal characteristics, religious beliefs, and appearance, of these therapists, can name-call and otherwise mock them, and can attribute false agendas to them, such as assigning religious motives to secular therapists working with ritual abuse or mind control survivors. For example, there is little to prevent someone from claiming on his or her own website that a psychotherapist is a fundamentalist Christian zealot at war with Satan, when that therapist might be an atheist, Jew, Buddhist, etc., who places no stock in the existence of Satan. But such a claim, when spoken as if it is fact, accomplishes its intended purpose of maligning that therapist." - Common Forms of Misinformation and Tactics of Disinformation about Psychotherapy for Trauma Originating in Ritual Abuse and Mind Control (2012)”

LiesTherapyRumorSlanderMind ControlMisinformationBrainwashingLibelSatanic Ritual AbuseName CallingDisinformationMockingReligious BeliefsPsycotherapyChristian FundamentalistsChristian ZealotsInternet BiasPsycholotherapists
Author:Ellen P. Lacter
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“Because the problem of ritual abuse and mind control has not gone away - the survivors are still there - many more therapists have learnt about it. Survivors have spoken out and written their stories, and therapists have learnt a great deal from those brave survivors who have discovered what was done to them. There is a large special interest group on Ritual Abuse and Mind Control within the International Society for the Study of Dissociation. Those therapists who have learnt in isolation or in small private online forums are once again sharing their knowledge widely, and books such as this one are beginning to be published again. The work is still very difficult and challenging, but we now know so much more than we did. We know that there is not one massive Satanic cult, but many different interrelated groups, including religious, military/political, and organized crime, using mind control on children and adult survivors. We know that there are effective treatments. We know that many of the paralyzing beliefs our clients lived by are the results of lies and tricks perpetrated by their abusers. And we know that, as therapists, we can combat this evil with wise and compassionate therapy.”

PsychologyLiesAbuseTricksTherapyTreatmentManipulationCultTherapistsMind ControlSurvivorsSatanicRitual AbuseAbusersPerpetratorsSociety DenialGovernment AbuseSatanic Ritual AbuseOrganized CrimePsychological AbuseCultsDisinformationSatanic CultCriminal Gangs
Book:Healing the Unimaginable: Treating Ritual Abuse and Mind Control
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“The first generation of therapists doing this work were told by their clients that the one massive cult was everywhere, knew everything, had access to state-of-the-art technology, and was willing to kill both clients and therapists to stop the information from getting out." [] "The reality is that even before stories of ritual abuse and mind control began coming out to therapists, the groups had agreed on what kind of disinformation to spread, so that clients would be afraid to tell their therapists what had happened to them, and therapists would be afraid to work with these clients." [ ] "We know that there is not one massive Satanic cult, but many different interrelated groups, including religious, military/political, and organized crime, using mind control on children and adult survivors. We know that there are effective treatments. We know that many of the paralyzing beliefs our clients lived by are the results of lies and tricks perpetrated by their abusers.”

CrimeLiesTricksTherapyDeceitConspiracyBeliefsMind ControlRitual AbuseAbusersSatanic Ritual AbuseOrganized CrimeDisinformationSra
Book:Healing the Unimaginable: Treating Ritual Abuse and Mind Control
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“I have found that much that happens in supervision/consultation focuses on what needs to happen next. There can be a sense of the person under consideration becoming a static object to be analyzed, and then advice may be offered about how that person could/should be shaped in a certain (presumably healthier) way.”

PsychologyRespectTherapyAttunementHarmful Therapy
Book:The Heart of Trauma: Healing the Embodied Brain in the Context of Relationships
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“Where were Christians before Freud? Up a tree? Were the bereft of all crucial knowledge about man's relationship to God and his neighbor? Was the church's counseling a hopeless, primitive, stone-age activity that should have disappeared with flint knives? Were Christians shut up to sinful, harmful living before the advent of psychotherapy? Did God withhold truth for living until our present age?”

LifeGodChristianChurchPsychologyBibleTherapyPsychotherapyCounselingFreud
Book:Theology of Christian Counseling, A
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“Healing is the way of the heart. This book is an invitation to open our heart. Healing is a love affair with life. Healing is pure love. Love is what creates healing. Spiritual healing is to be one with ourselves. And to be one with ourselves is to be in joy. Healing is to develop our inner being. Healing is to discover that which is already perfect within ourselves. It is to rediscover our inner life source. Spiritual healing is to be one with life. We are never really alone, it is our idea of a separate "I" that creates the feeling of being separate from life, from the Whole. In reality there is only one heart, a pulsating Existential heart. Our own heart pulsates in unity with the Existential heartbeats. We are all notes in the Existential music, and without our unique note the music would not be complete. We are all needed in the Whole; we all have our unique fragrance, quality and gifts to contribute to the Whole. More than 30 years ago, I had an individual consultation with a spiritual teacher. I did not have time to sit down before I got the question: "You are interested in healing, are you not?" It was the first time that I encountered the topic that would become my way and deep source of joy in life. This spiritual teacher finished the consultation saying: "You will be a fine healer." The art of healing is the psychology of being, the science of inner transformation. The psychology of being begins where Western psychology ends. It goes beyond Skinner, Freud, Jung, Rogers, Maslow and humanistic psychology. The psychology of being is the psychology of consciousness, a psychology for inner transformation. It is not basically a question of psychology, it is a question of being. The psychology of being begins where we are, and take us to everything that we can be. The underlying theme the psychology of being is meditation - but not meditation as a static technique - but as the capacity to BE with ourselves and others in a quality of watchful awareness, acceptance and realization. The art of being is a search beyond the personality. It a search beyond the thoughts, the emotions and the learned attitudes of the personality, to the inner being, to the depth within, which is hidden in ourselves. The inner being is a deep acceptance of ourselves as we are; the inner being is to be available to life. The inner being is to be in unity with life. This book is an invitation to meet the inner being, our inner source of love, joy, acceptance, humor, intuition, understanding, wisdom, truth, silence and creativity.”

LoveWisdomTruthJoySpiritualityUnderstandingRelationshipsHealingSilenceCreativityPsychologyMeditationAcceptanceIntuitionTherapyBeingFreudSkinnerMaslowOneness With LifeRogers
Book:Presence - Working from Within. The Psychology of Being
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“From the perspective of Islam, the ultimate goal of therapy is not simply to change thinking, emotion, or behaviour, but rather to have an impact upon the soul. This impact, in turn, will affect the other components of the human being. The foundation of any interventions will revolve around the spiritual development of the client. The focus on spiritual aspects will enhance the likelihood of effective and enduring outcomes. This is in contrast to secular approaches that focus on symptoms rather than addressing the primary cause, generally resulting in short-lived effects.”

SoulPsychologyMental HealthTherapySpiritual Development
Book:Psychology from the Islamic Perspective
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