“Seeing John Major govern the country is like watching Edward Scissorhands try to make balloon animals.” TryingCountryAnimalSeeingMajorsBalloonsEdward Scissorhands Author:Simon Hoggart
“If animals had a Pope," Major Thompson said to me, "their Vatican would be in London. And if by some dire submarine cataclysm that noble vessel, Great Britain, were to be shipwrecked and start to founder, believe me, there would surely be somebody in Westminster to cry from the top of the Tower: "Dogs first!” IfsFirstsBelieveSaidWould BeAnimalDogCryMajorsNobleLondonBritainBelieve In MeFoundersTowersPopeVesselGreat BritainSubmarinesWestminster Author:Pierre Daninos
“All in all it's a pretty great day for major league sports. At long last they've decided that gay people are fit to be included in their elite club-one that's already allowed in adulterers, wife-swappers, gamblers, cheaters, rapists, racists and slaughterers of man. Those who've abused spouses, drugs, alcohol, family members and animals. Congratulations, gay athletes. Are you sure you want to hang out with these people?” PeopleMenWantLongLastsSportsChangeAnimalWifeFitGayDrugMembersMajorsDecidedAthleteClubsAlcoholLeagueRacistHanging OutElitesSpouseCongratulationsGay PeopleFamily MembersGreat DayMajor LeagueCheater Author:Jon Stewart
“Industrial agriculture now accounts for over half of America's water pollution. Two years ago, Pfiesteria outbreaks connected with wastes from industrial chicken factories forced the closure of two major tributaries of the Chesapeake and threatened Maryland's vital shellfish industry. Tyson Foods has polluted half of all streams in northwestern Arkansas with so much fecal bacteria that swimming is prohibited. Drugs and hormones needed to keep confined animals alive and growing are mainly excreted with the wastes and saturate local waterways.” YearsTwoAmericaWaterAnimalHalfAliveGrowingIndustryNeededDrugWasteMajorsYears AgoAccountsEnvironmentalConnectedLocalsStreamsTwo YearsChickensSwimmingFactoriesPollutionAgricultureThreatenedConfinedHormonesClosureTysonBacteriaArkansasTwo Years AgoOutbreaksMarylandShellfishWater PollutionNorthwestern Author:Robert F. Kennedy, Jr.
“I've never seen a great actor do a major role that didn't cost a lot. They're sacrificial animals of a sort.” ActorsAnimalRolesCostMajorsGreat Actors Author:Tony Kushner
“One of the major hobbies in South Florida is keeping animals that no sane person would want to keep. One of those is snakes. They usually get them when they're small, and when they get too big, they let them go. But there are also people with monkeys, lions, tigers. And they all get away, eventually.” PeopleWantPersonsBigsAnimalMajorsSouthGet AwayLionsSaneFloridaHobbiesMonkeysTigersSnakesSouth Florida Author:Dave Barry
“I don't care how hot a girl is - if she doesn't like animals, it would be a major, major problem.” IfsProblemWould BeCareGirlAnimalMajorsHotDon't CareI Don't CareMajor Problems Author:Ian Somerhalder
“Why do cats sleep so much? Perhaps they've been trusted with some major cosmic task, an essential law of physics - such as: if there are less than five million cats sleeping at any one time the world will stop spinning.” IfsThinkingWorldLooksHardFactsLawSleepAnimalMillionsEssentialsMajorsTasksCatPhysicsLazyOne TimeCosmicTrustedSpinningLaws Of Physics Author:Kate Atkinson