“My mom was a pretty hard worker. She worked her ass off, but I'd say we were middle class. I had a car in high school, so I loved the idea that I could mimic this lifestyle.” IdeasHardSchoolClassMiddleCarHard WorkMomHigh SchoolWorkersMy MomLifestyleAssMiddle ClassHard Worker Author:Reggie Watts
“My family and my friends-they keep me grounded. Especially my mom, because she would kick my ass if I was to change.” IfsMomMy FriendsMy FamilyMy MomAssKicksGrounded Author:Lil Wayne
“As for my own truncated secondary education, my head was in the clouds as my mom would say, or if you asked my father, up my ass.” IfsFatherMy OwnMomCloudsMy MomAssSecondary Education Author:Michael J. Fox
“Time machine... wouldn't you like to travel through time? I would. I'd go back... mess with people. You know what I would do? I would go back to when my mom and dad were having sex, to have me. Ya'know, come in, spank my dad on the ass I'm your son from the future! Ahaha!” PeopleKnowsSexSonMomDadMachinesMy DadMy MomAssMessRough TimesMom And DadHaving SexYour SonTime Machine Author:Dane Cook
“My dad also survived five divorces, and the women he married cleaned his ass out every time. I used to think my dad got divorced because he wanted new furniture. At one point in my life, all we had left was a wooden box, a 12 black-and-white TV, and a four-man rubber raft for a couch. And yet, I was the coolest kid in third grade. Mom, can we have a sleepover in Christopher Titus' house? They have a raft in the living room! We can row to breakfast in the morning. I can actually be Captain Crunch!” ThinkingMenI CanKidsWantedUsedHouseLeftBlackWhiteRoomsMorningFiveFourTvsMomDadMarriedThirdsMy DadBoxesDivorceAssGradesBreakfastBlack And WhiteCaptainsSurvivedFurnitureDivorcedCouchesLiving RoomRubberCrunchThird GradeSleepovers Author:Christopher Titus
“I am just here to support the President of the United States. President of the United States is our boss, but he is also... you know, the President and the First Lady are kinda like the Mom and the Dad of the country. And when your Dad says something you listen, and when you don't it will usually bite you on the ass later on. So, I'm here to support the President.” KnowsFirstsCountryStatesPresidentUnitedUnited StatesSupportMomDadAssBossBitesFirst LadyYour Dad Author:Chris Rock
“When I wrote the book, I thought that I was the hero of my story. And in writing it, I came to realize over time that my mom was the hero. And I was, you know - I was just her punk-ass sidekick.” KnowsWritingBookStoriesRealizingMomHeroMy MomAssPunkSidekicks Author:Trevor Noah
“New York was fun as a kid. I loved to go walking. It was an adventure. I remember throwing my retainer into a garbage can one time and my mom yelling, "Get your ass over here now!" And I had to dig through the garbage and find my retainer.” KidsRememberFunAdventureMomWalkingMy MomAss Author:Liv Tyler