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John Niland Quotes

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Famous John Niland Quotes

“My biggest concern with positive affirmations is not so much whether they work or not, but that they reinforce this tyrannical imperative of positive thinking (and self-esteem). In this kingdom of positivity, there is no room for down days. When my friend cannot be positive, will she be even harder on herself? That’s the problem with positive thinking: it’s a plant with shallow roots. We need deep roots to sustain us through prolonged harsh conditions. Hence the insistence on planting self-worth in deep soil, below the shallow layer of all assessments.”

“As the foundation of all progress with self-worth is acceptance, we build self-worth by asserting our value, not assessing it. Self-worth is a declaration, not an evaluation. There are no scales, no points, no scores out of a hundred, no preconditions. There is but a single assertion: “Because I’m worth it” or your own equivalent.”

“Our relationship with ourselves significantly affects how we interact with other people. Our self-esteem frequently depends on how we feel we are “doing” at relationships. Given that this fluctuates, so does our self-esteem. Intellectually, we may tell ourselves that it shouldn’t, but when have emotions ever obeyed the intellect?”