Quotessence
Home / Authors / Julie Lythcott-Haims Books

Julie Lythcott-Haims Books

Author

Related Quotes

“When you intervene on behalf of your child, your child becomes the victim. You're expressing the message 'You're incapable, you're not sturdy enough to resolve this yourself, you need me to come in and take care of this for you.'" You are, in essence, disempowering your child.”

FreedomIndependenceParenting
Book:How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success
Create image

“Over time, from trial and error, and one experience after another, you start to become more familiar with yourself. You learn what excites you, and just as importantly you learn what repels you. You begin to develop that 'I could see myself doing this forever' feeling, whether it's about a line of work or a relationship. You want to look for clues as to what really matters to you. And you want to get better at making decisions accordingly.”

DecisionsAdulthoodKnowing Yourself
Book:Your Turn: How to Be an Adult
Create image

“Back when I was constantly trying to impress authority, I'd be really perfect and cheery on the outside but I would break down as soon as I was by myself... I had to learn to set healthy boundaries so I wouldn't put myself in a place of breakdown. Making pros and cons lists for hard decisions helped me do this. Now I'm standing up for my 'no.' I trust the instincts in my body; I get tension in my body if something isn't right for me. I have to trust my instincts without knowing the full picture. 'No' is a complete answer. 'No' means, 'I appreciate how much you want this, but I have to say no to you and say yes to myself." Fending is indeed standing up for your 'no.' It also entails letting others know that you are capable of fending for yourself.”

BoundariesAdulthoodSelf CareSaying No
Book:Your Turn: How to Be an Adult
Create image

“It takes tremendous courage to keep going for your dreams in the face of laughter. Particularly if those judging you are closes family, or prominent in some way that matters to you. I'm here from my fiftysomething perch to say to you: Keep going. Honor your voice. Even if they laugh, do it anyway. People who judge others tend to be very unhappy with some aspect of their own life. A huge aspect of adulting is finding the courage to do what you want with your life even if those who claim to love you the most outright disown you for it. It's YOUR life. Don't you ever forget that.”

LifeDreamsAdulthood
Book:Your Turn: How to Be an Adult
Create image