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Quote by Julie Lythcott-Haims

“Back when I was constantly trying to impress authority, I'd be really perfect and cheery on the outside but I would break down as soon as I was by myself... I had to learn to set healthy boundaries so I wouldn't put myself in a place of breakdown. Making pros and cons lists for hard decisions helped me do this. Now I'm standing up for my 'no.' I trust the instincts in my body; I get tension in my body if something isn't right for me. I have to trust my instincts without knowing the full picture. 'No' is a complete answer. 'No' means, 'I appreciate how much you want this, but I have to say no to you and say yes to myself." Fending is indeed standing up for your 'no.' It also entails letting others know that you are capable of fending for yourself.”

Quote by Julie Lythcott-Haims

Book:Your Turn: How to Be an Adult
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Your Turn: How to Be an Adult

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Julie Lythcott-Haims

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“Every time you're tempted to say 'I'm too busy' say instead, 'That's not a priority for me, therefore it's not a promise I've made and I'll have to decline.' If you're brave enough to make the switch, one of two things is going to happen when you do: Either you're going to feel really bad when you realize that something that deeply matters to you (your kids, your health, your marriage, your commitment to justice, cultivating lifelong friendships) isn't actually the priority you want to believe it is. This will compel you to go back to your Very Important Promises and see what you can cut in order to create space for the things that really matter to you. OR Saying that statement may initially sting because we've been conditioned to feel bad about 'Nos,' but as the words settle, it will feel true/i> to you. Instead of allowing this thing you're 'too busy for' to perpetually hang over your head, your NO (because it is not a priority or a promise) will free you up to unapologetically and confidently spend your limited moments and resources on the things that matter most to you.”

PrioritiesSaying NoBusyness
Book:Beginner's Pluck: Build Your Life of Purpose and Impact Now
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“Every time you're tempted to say 'I'm too busy' say instead, 'That's not a priority for me, therefore it's not a promise I've made and I'll have to decline.' If you're brave enough to make the switch, one of two things is going to happen when you do: Either you're going to feel really bad when you realize that something that deeply matters to you (your kids, your health, your marriage, your commitment to justice, cultivating lifelong friendships) isn't actually the priority you want to believe it is. This will compel you to go back to your Very Important Promises and see what you can cut in order to create space for the things that really matter to you. OR Saying that statement may initially sting because we've been conditioned to feel bad about 'Nos,' but as the words settle, it will feel true to you. Instead of allowing this thing you're 'too busy for' to perpetually hang over your head, your NO (because it is not a priority or a promise) will free you up to unapologetically and confidently spend your limited moments and resources on the things that matter most to you.”

PrioritiesSaying NoBusyness
Book:Beginner's Pluck: Build Your Life of Purpose and Impact Now
Create image