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Susan J. Douglas

Susan J. Douglas Biography

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“It's 5:22pm you're in the grocery checkout line. Your three-year-old is writhing on the floor, screaming, because you have refused to buy her a Teletubby pinwheel. Your six-year-old is whining, repeatedly, in a voice that could saw through cement, "But mommy, puleeze, puleeze" because you have not bought him the latest "Lunchables," which features, as the four food groups, Cheetos, a Snickers, Cheez Whiz, and Twizzlers. Your teenager, who has not spoken a single word in the past foor days, except, "You've ruined my life," followed by "Everyone else has one," is out in the car, sulking, with the new rap-metal band Piss on the Parentals blasting through the headphones of a Discman. To distract yourself, and to avoid the glares of other shoppers who have already deemed you the worst mother in America, you leaf through People magazine. Inside, Uma thurman gushes "Motherhood is Sexy." Moving on to Good Housekeeping, Vanna White says of her child, "When I hear his cry at six-thirty in the morning, I have a smile on my face, and I'm not an early riser." Another unexpected source of earth-mother wisdom, the newly maternal Pamela Lee, also confides to People, "I just love getting up with him in the middle of the night to feed him or soothe him." Brought back to reality by stereophonic whining, you indeed feel as sexy as Rush Limbaugh in a thong.”

RealityMediaMotherhood
Book:The Mommy Myth: The Idealization of Motherhood and How It Has Undermined All Women
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“Intensive mothering is the ultimate female Olympics: We are all in powerful competition with each other, in constant danger of being trumped by the mom down the street, or in the magazine we're reading. The competition isn't just over who's a good mother--it's over who's the best. We compete with each other; we compete with ourselves. The best mothers always put their kids' needs before their own, period.”

NeedsKidsMotherReadingPowerfulStreetsDangerMomPeriodsFemaleUltimateConstantCompetitionMotherhoodMagazinesOlympicsMotheringGood MotherBest Mother
Author:Susan J. Douglas
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“We all know what feminists are. They are shrill, overly aggressive, man-hating, ball-busting, selfish, hairy, extremist, deliberately unattractive women with absolutely no sense of humor who see sexism at every turn. They make men's testicles shrivel up to the size of peas, they detest the family and think all children should be deported or drowned.”

ThinkingKnowsMenShouldChildrenHateTurnsBallsSizeFeministSelfishSense Of HumorSexismAggressiveExtremistDetestUnattractivePeasTesticlesBustingMan Hating
Author:Susan J. Douglas
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“..."Fun?" you ask. "Weren't feminists these grim-faced, humorless, antifamily, karate-chopping ninjas who were bitter because they couldn't get a man?" Well, in fact the problem was that all too many of them HAD gotten a man, married him, had his kids, and then discovered that, as mothers, they were never supposed to have their own money, their own identity, their own aspirations, time to pee, or a brain. And yes, some women indeed became bad-tempered as a result. After all, no anger, no social change.”

MenWellsFactsProblemKidsMotherAsksFunSocialResultsBrainIdentityMarriedFeministBitterAspirationSocial ChangeGrimKarateNinjaChoppingNo Anger
Author:Susan J. Douglas
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“Here's the progression. Feminism won; you can have it all; of course you want children; mothers are better at raising children than fathers; of course your children come first; of course you come last; today's children need constant attention, cultivation, and adoration, or they'll become failures and hate you forever; you don't want to fail at that; it's easier for mothers to abandon their work and their dreams than for fathers; you don't want it all anymore (which is good because you can't have it all); who cares about equality, you're too tired; and whoops--here we are in 1954.”

WantNeedsFirstsChildrenDreamCareTodayLastsMotherHateCoursesFatherAttentionForeverFailingFeminismEasierTiredConstantYour ChildrenAbandonWho CaresHate YouRaising ChildrenAdorationProgressionCultivation
Author:Susan J. Douglas
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