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Quote by Esther Perel

“Today, our sexuality is an open-ended personal project; it is part of who we are, an identity, and no longer merely something we do.”

Quote by Esther Perel

Book:Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence

Work

Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence

This book delves into the dynamics of long-term relationships, discussing how couples can sustain sexual and emotional intimacy. It examines the factors that contribute to the decline of passion in partnerships and offers strategies for reigniting and maintaining a fulfilling romantic life. more

Author

Esther Perel is a renowned author and therapist known for her profound insights into couple relationships and sexual psychology. Her work delves into the complexities of modern marriage, love, and sex, offering readers a unique perspective. more

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“At the same time, eroticism in the home requires active engagement and willful intent. It is an ongoing resistance to the message that marriage is serious, more work than play; and that passion is for teenagers and the immature. We must unpack our ambivalence about pleasure, and challenge our pervasive discomfort with sexuality, particularly in the context of family. Complaining of sexual boredom is easy and conventional. Nurturing eroticism in the home is an act of open defience.”

“But when we reduce sex to a function, we also invoke the idea of dysfunction. We are no longer talking about the art of sex; rather, we are talking about the mechanics of sex. Science has replaced religion as the authority; and science is a more formidable arbiter. Medicine knows how to scare even those who scoff at religion. Compared with a diagnosis, what's a mere sin? We used to moralize; today we normalize, and performance anxiety is the secular version of our old religious guilt.”

“Very often we don’t go elsewhere because we are looking for another person. We go elsewhere because we are looking for another self. It isn’t so much that we want to leave the person we are with as we want to leave the person we have become.”

Want Persons Self Elsewhere

Author:Esther Perel

“If you start to feel that you have given up too many parts of yourself to be with your partner, then one day you will end up looking for another person in order to reconnect with those lost parts.”

Ifs Feels Persons Ends Order Lost Given One Day Partners Given Up

Author:Esther Perel

“When there is nothing left to hide, there is nothing left to seek.”

Author:Esther Perel

“Actually, I have an interest in finishing my Ph.D., but I just know I never will.”

Knows Interest Finishing

Author:David Duchovny

“Romantics value intensity over stability. Realists value security over passion. But both are often disappointed, for few people can live happily at either extreme.”

People Values Passion Security Extremes Disappointed Stability Intensity Realist

Book:Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence

Source: Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence

“Mystery is not always about travelling to new places, it is about looking with new eyes.”

Eye Mystery New Places New Eyes

Author:Esther Perel

“It isn’t so much that we want to leave the person we are with as we want to leave the person we have become.”

Author:Esther Perel

“Sometimes it has to do with other longings that are much more existential. Sometimes you go elsewhere not because you are not liking the one you are with; you are not liking the person you have become.”

Persons Sometimes Longing Elsewhere Existential

Author:Esther Perel