“I waved to you outside but then I realized it was just one of those inflatable parking lot gorillas.” I RealizedJust OneParkingGorillasParking Lot Author:Jane Lynch
“Actual creativeness is a matter of moments. One has to piece together the minute grains to make a lump. And it is so easy to miss the momentary flashes, it is like sluicing in placer mining. He who lets the flakes float by has nothing to show for his trouble.” MatterMomentsShowsTogetherEasyPiecesTroubleMinutesMissingGrainFlashFloatsLumpsMomentaryMiningCreativenessFlakes Author:Eric Hoffer
“I have terrible periods of lack of confidence. I just don't believe I can do it and no evidence to the contrary will sway me from that view.” BelieveI CanCan DoViewsPeriodsTerribleEvidenceDon't BelieveContraryI Can Do ItLack Of Confidence Author:Douglas Adams
“It's good to leave your room super-messy when you're away. Whoever tries to break into your room will thought it has already been ransacked.” TryingRoomsBreakMessyYour Room Author:Douglas Adams
“With competition there is always ego and hubris... competition gets in the way of work.” WayEgoCompetitionHubris Author:Patrick Dempsey
“Mike Huckabee said he's the only person who has fought the Clinton political machine and won. As opposed to Democratic candidate Bernie Sanders, who's the only person who fought a fax machine and lost.” PersonsSaidPoliticalLostMachinesDemocraticClintonCandidatesMikeFaxFax Machines Author:Jimmy Fallon
“A federal court has ruled that the U.S. Postal Service must reduce its stamp prices. The change in stamp prices is expected to affect as many as seven Americans.” CourtSevenExpectedStampsPostal Service Author:Conan O'Brien
“Lincoln Chafee, former governor of Rhode Island, announced he's running for president. Before he announced he's running, his wife went on Facebook and asked his staff if they remembered his password. Because if a Facebook password is too hard to remember, the launch codes for the nukes should be a piece of cake.” IfsShouldHardRunningRememberPresidentPiecesWifeFormerCodeRememberedIslandsCakeGovernorsStaffPasswordsNukesRhode Island Author:Jimmy Fallon
“Santa will be showing up with Rudolph the Red-Eyed Reindeer.” RedSantaShowing UpReindeerRudolph Author:Conan O'Brien